No, not the musical, or even the book it was based on.  This blog is about our cats.  If the wife and I can figure out how to download and insert photos, there will be pictures.  If not, you’ll just have to take my words for them.  You might want to break out the No-Doz before proceeding, but you’ve been warned.

The wife and I both love all animals, at least the ones that don’t try to take a piece out of us.  We like dogs.  We had a succession of Scotties, but when the last one died, we accepted a male wheaten/schnauzer/ poodle cross.  He would compare well, mentally, to a buckwheat pancake, if the pancake were terribly insecure and needy.

The daughter had got to know a vendor at the local farmers’ market.  Among other money-making ventures, she sells cutesy plastic signs, most of them referring to breeds of dogs.  Daughter told her how unthrilled we were with this dog, and she wanted to know why we didn’t have a cat, or seven.  We all suffer allergies, and the dog’s coat is hypo-allergenic.  We love cats, and used to have them, till allergies became too strong.  Well, wouldn’t you know it; she had just the solution to our problem.

She used to raise emus, have them butchered and sell the meat and various other parts, but ended up losing money on them.  Now she raises miniature dachshunds and Bengal cats.  Bengals don’t have fur.  They have hair; there is a difference.  These are also non-allergenic.  She just happened to have a male which had been returned.  His owner had some medical problems and didn’t have the strength or money to deal with the cat’s medical problems.  Turns out, the biggest problem was a vet who was taking her to the cleaners.  She had paid $500 for this beautiful cat, but we could have him for free, so the breeder didn’t have to keep feeding and maintaining him.

Bengals were produced by breeding an Asian wildcat with various housecats.  If you’ve seen a Benylin TV commercial with a *tour guide*, at the end of it there are a couple of shots of a slinky, spotted, ocelot-type feline, up on a branch.  I think that’s my cats’ ancestor. Whatever it was, apparently it dealt with lots of water in the wild.  Bengals can be identified by their webbed feet.  Spread their toes, and they can almost walk on water, and water, especially running water, fascinates them.  If I pour a bath and climb in, I’m soon the subject of much supervision, a couple from the tub rim.

It depends on what domestic cat and coloring was used, to produce certain markings.  They come in spots, rosettes, which are spots which have opened to donuts, stripes, and marbled, which is dark stripes against a dark coat.  The next step up is a Savannah, produced by cross-breeding certain Bengals.  Their colors and shaping are even nicer than Bengals.  My daughter has two of them at her house.  These cats are incredibly intelligent.  They’d be easily trainable, if they weren’t so damned independent.

The first one we got would have been the only one we got, except…. they don’t have the domestic strength of a housecat.  The over-busy vet injected him for feline leukemia, and used live culture.  The breed can’t resist live-culture, and he actually got the disease.  Called Cinnabar, which is an ore of mercury, he was one damned fine cat.  He would come when you called.  He could play fetch, and he liked to eat snow.  We found that out one day when we let the dog out and a bit got kicked inside.  From then on, if the dog went in or out, I had to toss a handful of snow on the mat, and he would eat it like a sno-cone.  We had him less than a year.  He was an early generation, and can never be replaced by later models.

All Bengals suffer to some degree with feline hyperesthesia, called ripple skin.  You can watch their coat and see the skin wiggle around.  These cats don’t want to be petted, they want to be scratched, firmly, especially down the spine and at the base of the tail, or smacked there.  The wife thumps one male on his bony ass so hard, she bruises her hand.  If animal welfare saw us pounding on these cats, they’d probably confiscate them, but the cats love it.

We drove 75 miles to a supposedly reliable breeder for our next male.  He was a failed stud.  Beautiful coloring and configuration, but he had to keep telling the lady cats, “This has never happened to me before.”  He cost us $500 and he was/is so hyper that we have to give him amitriptyline twice a day, to keep the yowling down.  When we had him vet checked, we found that he was skinny because of two different stomach parasites.

Besides his nerve pills, we were supposed to give him two different medications each day.  Like a chemotherapy program, the three meds almost killed him.  We had to stop the one, get him cured of the first, and then go back to kill off the second.  The breeder refunded us our money and then shut down her cattery for an antiseptic purge.  This guy we called Mica.  Some of the cats’ hair is hollow, and his hollow hair is the whitish, and it glistens silvery/white in the light, like the mineral mica does.

We have a total of four cats, another two males and an ex-breeder female.  I dote on them all, but your attention span is only so long.  I thank you if you’ve read this far without dozing off.  Perhaps we’ll leave the other three, and maybe the photos for another day.  Dogs have owners.  Cats have staff, and this staff has to go feed one of them.

17 thoughts on “Cats

  1. Nicole says:

    Cats have staff, and this staff has to go feed one of them.

    So true. Everytime I go visit my uncle, his cat automatically runs over to his dinner bowl expecting treats. If I pet him for a minute or so without giving him anything, the cat either starts to take a swipe at me thinking my hand is just another toy to tear up or just walks off, clearly bored with the interaction. And then of course by this time the dog is also expecting treats. If I give something to the cat then i have to give something to the dog. Their like little kids that way.

    We actually found that cat. Someone must have dumped him off in the neighorhood. He was just a kitten at the time and we kept hearing a loud meowing from the porch. After a few days my uncle took him into the vet and got him checked out. The fur looks black but up close you see stripes of dark brown in between the black. Extremely cute cat.

    Hope you do eventually figure out how to upload pictures here.


    • Archon's Den says:

      Hobbler was right. Post a blog about nothing but kittens, and everybody wants to read it. Ted, at SnB was nice enough to forward a tutorial about how to download and insert pictures. After reading it four or five times, the wife knows how to accomplish the feat. After reading it four or five times, I know how to nag the wife into doing it. Pics next blog.


      • Nicole says:

        Hahaha – because cats are so cute! We probably need them more than they need us.


      • I read the whole thing! Do they naturally have hair instead of fur? Or did humans breed them like that? I think bald cats are really cute1 everyone hates them apart from me. I think they look really cute, like pink raisins! Gertie xxx


  2. pouring myself a big cup of coffee and commencing reading….


    • Not boring, delightful, but then again I like cats. My favorite line from this whole post, “If I pour a bath and climb in, I’m soon the subject of much supervision, a couple from the tub rim.”


      • Archon's Den says:

        Damn! Stupid WordPress. That’s twice it didn’t put the reply in the right place. Not that they don’t want a bath, just not *right now*. One slipped in one day, and used me to get back out, Quick. Ah well, hot soapy water is antiseptic and astringent. At least there were no sharks.


    • Archon's Den says:

      Hurry up! Hurry up! I can’t wait.


  3. whiteladyinthehood says:

    I’ve never heard of a cat eating snow! I had 2 cats not too long ago…they are both gone…this post makes me want to go get a new kitten!


    • Archon's Den says:

      Forebears from hot steamy jungles, it never occured to me either. If he drank water, it had to be run till it was Cold. A few times I put ice cubes in. He lapped right around them.


    • Archon's Den says:

      Thanx for the IT help. See reply above. Wife doesn’t do well with text manuals. As I said, her motto is Show Me, and that showed clearly. Look out pictures, here we come.


  4. […] know several bloggers who like pets, including Pied Type, Indiana Jen, and now Archon’s Den who just posted on his varied and interesting cat experiences. I am inspired to let my limited […]


  5. kayjai says:

    There once was a cat named Ed
    Whom Kayjai dutifully fed
    He was afraid of the outdoors
    And refused to be moored
    So we gave him to my friend and moved on.

    Kind of…We were transferred from Barrie in ’94 and Ed was so afraid of being outside the house, we were afraid he wouldn’t have survived the move. We had to give him away. That was the end of our cats. D2 is deathly allergic…to pets of all species. My apologies for the limerick/shitty poetry.


  6. Archon's Den says:

    ‘Dem’s Newfie poetry. Sticks to yer ribs. If I wanted better stuff, I can go be dazzled at Hotspur’s place. If you have a longing for cats, you could check out Bengals or Savannahs. The claim is, no allergies. Or wait a couple of years till D2 moves on. The only reason we can afford four, is that they are all rescues. Bengals are expensive. To get a Savannah, you might have to trade D2. You’d have to decide which was prettier.


  7. G’day! After reading your post, I’ve decided to bookmark your site because your site rocks!


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