Ode To CWC6161

Also, OWED to CWC6161

BrainRants was the first blog I found.  When I began infesting it with my random comments, it was from the commenters, rather than his blogroll, that I found and chose other bloggers’ posts to read.  One of the first, and the nicest, was a lovely lady named Candice W. Coghill.  Her blog I.D. is her initials, along with, what I believe is/was her age, twice.

Feeling that only grumpy old male dudes like me were curmudgeons, she wrote under the blog-name, The Kindly Hermudgeon, a softer, kinder, gentler female version.  I was impressed with, and attracted by her comments, and apparently she felt the same about me and mine.  When I got my own site up and running she was a regular reader/commenter, and one of my earliest followers.  It was she who reminded me to add a “Follow Me” widget.

I commented often on her site, which at that time, was largely about her personal life.  That first November, before I was “On The Net”, she participated in the NaNoWriMo, pumping out 2000 words a day for three weeks, and using the final week for editing and polishing.  I offered to refrain from distracting her, but she assured me that my online presence was welcome.  She was the first to send me a blog award, when I’d only published 14 posts.

As a long-term loner, I often have to work at accepting others as friends.  Such was not the case with The Hermudgeon.  She was intelligent, knowledgeable, literate, friendly, welcoming, supportive….the list goes on and on.  We were instant friends.  Despite being a couple of years younger than me, she was almost a web-mother to me, or a loving, caring sister, so unlike the psychotic minefield I shared ancestry with.

She lived in a little Atlantic coastal Florida town which shares my Scottish clan name.  I used Google Maps satellite view to see her frame house on a small inland bay.  I told her of passing almost within stone’s-throw distance as I had driven down to Key West.  I mentioned a central character in a book I was reading, who was recruited from her tiny town.  I told her of finding another Florida woman, half her age, with exactly the same name, a pill-dispensing medical worker, who liked to be called Candy Popper.  Not impressed with that name, she denied being related.

She was very dedicated to becoming a published author and helped many others in their quest.  Later posts were writing tips and tutorials, knitting-circle-type meetings, and real-time addresses from writers who had made it.  This woman was just Industrial Strength support and help to all she could reach.

Sadly, she had developed inoperable abdominal cancer behind her navel.  Many of her later posts told of radiation treatment and chemotherapy, which were provided by a mobile clinic, housed in a medium-sized jet airplane.  This aircraft flew from city to city, with a rotating schedule.  She got to know the doctor in charge, the nurses, and the flight crew.

She told of their care and concern, and how she had trouble working for two or three days after a treatment, because of weakness and disorientation.  She wrote of Doc Magic feeling that things were under control….but then of the ogre rearing its ugly head once more.

Because her blog had become about commercial writing and being published, I didn’t drop in as often as I had early on, but still stopped by occasionally, with a Like, a short comment and a word of support and hope.  Just about a year ago, on July 11, 2012, her posts suddenly stopped.  I dropped in every couple of days, then once a week, then twice a month – nothing.

I did a search, and found a mostly-English blog-site in France, and thought she’d moved, possibly for medical reasons.  When I paid a bit of attention, I realized that it was stagnant, with posts and comments a year and a half old.  Questions to some of her other regulars revealed that no-one had any information on where she had gone, or what had happened to her.

She was a fighter, and she treated me far better than I deserved.  I can only hope that she simply doesn’t have the time and strength to spare for blogging.  On March 20 of this year, I accessed her final post, and left the comment, “Goodbye sweet Angel.  You will be greatly missed!”  My daughter, LadyRyl, also got to know and like her very much.  She joins me to worry and wonder, to fear the worst, hope for the best, and miss this fine lady very much.  I checked her site again before publishing this tribute.  What may forever remain the final comment, is still, “Awaiting moderation.”

23 thoughts on “Ode To CWC6161

  1. BrainRants says:

    This is a kind tribute, Archon. I’ve had some Hermudgeonly comments on BR. I hope she’s well.

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    • Archon's Den says:

      Sadly, no! After posting this last night, I did a bit more research, and found a writer’s blog, which referenced another tribute blog, saying that she had passed away at the Treasure Coast Hospice in Florida, approx. October 1, last year. 😦

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  2. whiteladyinthehood says:

    Very sad, Archon. (I hope your friend is okay, too.)

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  3. Jim Wheeler says:

    A worthy and beautifully written memoir, Archon.

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  4. 1jaded1 says:

    This is touching. Underneath that grumpiness is a softy heart.

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  5. Michelle says:

    So sad, but this is a nice tribute to her.

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  6. Archon's Den says:

    Thanx Skippy! As she had done so much for me and others, I felt this was the least I could do for her.

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  7. Kayjai says:

    So sorry, Archon. Nice tribute, I’m sure she would have love to have read it.

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  8. Sightsnbytes says:

    she had a real friend in you, I bet that helped her a lot. Great tribute by a great writer.

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  9. benzeknees says:

    Ah, this is so sad. I hope you are right & she is busy recovering from her ordeal & too busy to write. Sadly, I wrote a post about this, you may remember: http://benzeknees.wordpress.com/2013/03/27/rip-benzeknees/ I’m going to continue to hope she will re-appear with a great story some day!

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  10. Archon's Den says:

    From a couple of other writer/bloggers, I have to accept that she has passed on. Stupid “privacy” laws won’t even let the hospice admit that she ever lived, much less that she died in their care, and when.

    I do remember this post. Late as usual, mine was the last comment. Perhaps, like people who hold their own wake, before they die, I should format and post my own obit, although I’ve already used this site to air most of my peccadillos. I may need to ask for some guidance from you.

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  11. Melissa says:

    I just stumbled across your lovely tribute to Candice this morning. She would have been so pleased and proud to know that you found her encouragement helpful-and touched to learn of your concern. I am sorry to tell you that your surmise was correct-Candice passed away on Septermber 21,2012. Bless you for your friendship to her and your concern. Candice’s kid sister, Melissa

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    • Archon's Den says:

      Thank you so much for your visit and comment. It brings sad and final closure to the story of a lovely lady I never met, and will never forget. I will never be an “Author,” but I am a much better blog-writer for the help and guidance she gave. The final, sad irony is that her date of passing was my 68th birthday. Along with many other people, I miss her! My sincere condolences.
      Archon (Arch) 😦

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  12. […] Ode to CWC6161 post, which I published last August 10th, was found by her younger sister, who left a lovely comment […]

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  13. Aw, Archon, it’s so hard to lose a blogging friend, especially one who was so instrumental in getting you started. Thank you for giving me the link to this post – I don’t think I was blogging in August of 2013., or at least I didn’t have my own site back then.

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  14. You have a kindness in you that is quite noble, my friend.

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