Flash Fiction #28

Hydrangeas with Ice


‘Gripe, gripe, grumble, bitch’

“Just look at that.  Not only are all the flowers dead and dried up, but now they’re all coated with ice.”

“There’s no use complaining dear.  It’s Nature’s plan.  Summer turns to winter, and all the plants die off and turn brown.  Next spring they’ll all be lush and green again.  It’s called the Cycle of Life.”

“That’s easy for you to say honey.  You’re from the Upper Michigan Peninsula – but you married a Southern Gentleman.  This is Atlanta!  Damn those Canadians and their polar vortexes and their Arctic jet streams!”

‘Grumble, gripe, bitch, bitch’

Go to Rochelle’s Addicted to Purple site and use her Wednesday photo as a prompt to write a complete 100 word story.

42 thoughts on “Flash Fiction #28

  1. wildbilbo says:

    Damn Canadians with their weather, and their syrup and their politeness and their mooses.

    I’ve complained about the weather before, but never blamed another country for them… that’s an interesting concept 🙂


  2. Archon's Den says:

    It’s a full-time game with lots of Americans. If some guy in Kentucky sneezes, the cold weather couldn’t have come from Minnesota or North Dakota, them damned Canucks are pushin’ it south again. 😦


  3. BrainRants says:

    I’ll be more than happy to blame you Canadians for our shitty winter weather. 😀


  4. Dear Archon,

    Tell him to call 1-800-WAAAAAHH. Personally I hate winter, too. Grumble, gripe, bitch.




    • Archon's Den says:

      Lemme write this down, 1-800…. Yeah, I’m gonna tell him. He’s cutting into my Grumpy Old Dude franchise, and diluting it because he’s sensitive, and likes flowers. Bah, humbug. 😉


  5. dmmacilroy says:

    Dear Archon,

    I see the polar vortex found its way onto your blog screen. Great story for the holidays. Where do the Canadians say that their wether is from? Siberia?




    • Archon's Den says:

      In the WordPress Dashboard, there’s a widget switch that you can click, so that you too could have snow in Hawaii.
      Snow and shitty weather is Santa’s secondary industry. It’s low profit, but high volume, and how he funds the toys giveaway. 😉


  6. dmmacilroy says:

    Sorry about the terrible spelling of weather.


  7. draliman says:

    Blame the Canadians! Reminds me of that song in the South Park movie 🙂


  8. And I bet it was those damn Canadians who sent that 6-8 feet of snow to Buffalo, NY a couple of weeks ago. It certainly wasn’t our fault.


  9. Sightsnbytes says:

    Talk about shitty weather. we are having quite the winter here. One day it freezes, next day it rains, then a storm, and then more rain…WTF?


  10. aFrankAngle says:

    Absolutely damn those Canadians. … alright, he’s one from Tim’s to make you feel better.


  11. elmowrites says:

    charming. bound to be someone’s fault though!


  12. Nice story. I’m sure that there’ll be a Justice Department investigation. Holder should be in Atlanta soon, but I assume there will be no indictment by a grand jury against the Canadians. After all, it was a snow white crime. Randy


  13. garden2day says:

    Hahahahahaha! Nice writing but I hate ice! 🙂 I know who to blame next time–those dang Canadians.. 😀 . I don’t tend to blame anyone except maybe Jim Cantore from the weather channel when he came in February and it was ground 0. It’s always the weatherman’s fault. Time for hot tea or hot chocolate 🙂 .


  14. hafong says:

    Hey, watch what you say about us Canadians, eh! 🙂 Look at what happened to Buffalo.



    • Archon's Den says:

      Was that comment directed at me, or my oblivious American readers?? I already am Canadian – but I know what the denizens of ‘the Greatest Country in the World’ say and do. Welcome to my insanity. Drop by again. 😀


  15. Nan Falkner says:

    Dear Archon, Great story of whining and griping. Don’t think I ever thought about blaming our lovely Canadian neighbors fault for the weather. Well done! Nan 🙂


  16. Vile weather wither bloom. Darn the wind from north.


  17. Canadians DO get blamed for a lot around here. Our town is just a few miles south of the border. I think I’ll add weather to the list.


  18. Amy Reese says:

    Yeah, and some have summer in winter, like in California. I was down in So Cal over Thanksgiving. A balmy 86 degrees! The plants get very confused I think.


    • Archon's Den says:

      Everything in moderation. A little of this – a little of that? 😕 I guess you can even get too much hot, sunny weather, but at least you don’t have to shovel it. BrainRants says he’s done with CA. 🙂


  19. Margaret says:

    I bet he really loves winter, he just has to grumble about something. Fun story – and I suppose by the rationale here, I’d have to blame Antarctica for any cold snaps here in Oz. Or maybe it’s the Tasmanians.


  20. Archon's Den says:

    Grumble just for the sake of grumbling???….Nah, couldn’t happen. I don’t know anybody like that – not even from Tasmania. I take it you’re not living in the Top End. 🙄


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