’20 A To Z Challenge – J

Jezebel

I once had a great-aunt named Jessie – until I got old enough that my Father told me I didn’t.

Just before I turned 12, my Father informed the family that his favorite aunt had rented a tiny cottage in our tourist town, and would be vacationing for a week.  Never married – she may have been lesbian – she still gathered four small children, cared for and mostly raised them, when Dad’s mother died, giving birth to his younger sister, and his father abandoned them to go off and become a hermit.

She always treated him particularly well.  The few times I met her, she treated me particularly well.  I had (almost) reached the Age Of Reason.  With no obvious prompt, my Dad said, “Her real name isn’t Jessie, you know.”  (No, I didn’t know that.)  “What is it then?”

JEZEBEL

Dad’s paternal grandparents weren’t exceedingly Christian.  Their two boys received common, normal names.  Dad’s dad was Howard.  His aunt may have been assigned her questionable moniker, because her mother was reminded.  She was an unfortunate, female, every-third-child, who was born with a head of brilliant red hair.

She soon tired of the name Jezebel.  She was picked on, mocked, and bullied, at school and in church.  She was still young – elementary school – when she decided to do something about the despicable actions and attitudes of ‘Good Christians.’  Jezebel disappeared, never to be heard of again, and Jessie (or was it Jesse?) came into being, to take her place.

I am so glad that my mother gave me two Plain-Jane (Well…. You know what I mean) names.  I can disappear in a crowd of two.  Archon, and the Grumpy Old Dude, haven’t disappeared though.  Stop back again soon, and I’ll tell you about the fellow who appeared before a judge, requesting to legally change his name.  The judge asked, “What is your name?”  He replied, “Joe Schitts.”  “Well, I can understand why you would want to change your name.  What do you want to change it to?”  “Bob!”  😯

12 thoughts on “’20 A To Z Challenge – J

  1. Rivergirl says:

    An aunt named Jezebel? Epic.

    Like

  2. Garfield Hug says:

    Jezebel and Jo Schitts noooooo….🤦‍♀️Face palm but I laughed so hard with Garfield.

    Like

  3. You need to go on a talk show and tell these stories.

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    • Archon's Den says:

      I would think that people would be more likely to pay me to keep quiet. 😉
      What are your thoughts/feelings about my monthly Atheist screeds?? Are you particularly religious? 😕

      Liked by 1 person

      • Like Jimmy Buffett, I was a Catholic Altar Boy and thought about becoming a priest, until my wild high school and college partying days and beautiful women arrived. I don’t go to church anymore these days though. I used to golf until I hurt my back, and now I watch CBS Sunday Morning. I have no idea who is really right and wrong about religion and politics, so I rarely speak about the subjects. In this part of Virginia, it will only lead to unpleasant arguments.

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  4. LOL! My eldest daughter used to have a classmate from India and his name is Akhshit. It’s a taboo to even mention his name in school. Poor boy! Perhaps his name has a beautiful meaning in Sanskrit. ∩(︶▽︶)∩

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    • Archon's Den says:

      There is a local Indian immigrant, brought here to Canada when he was very young. He has been convicted for the ninth time, of drunk driving. He has smashed into, damaged, and driven away from, other vehicles, trees and power poles. His driving license was long since permanently revoked. He drives without one, or any insurance.
      He tried to run down a policeman who managed to pull him over. He assaulted a police officer and a court bailiff. At his last court appearance, he stood up in court and told the judge that he would just go out and do it again. His excuse (There IS no excuse!) was that his name is Sukhvinder, and schoolmates made fun of him/it. 😛 😥

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Dick Stein says:

    And when the Judge looked up at the chap who wanted to change his name…

    ” Why? Why Do you want to keep your unfortunate last name and change your first one? ”

    ” Because, Your Honour, I’m so sick of people coming up to me and saying ‘ Hello, Joe. Whaddaya know? ‘ .”

    Like

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