Flash Fiction #235

PHOTO PROMPT © CEAyr

YOU CAN’T GET THERE FROM HERE

How do you get to the K-W Oktoberfest Parade??!
Well, I wouldn’t start from here.

Summer road construction diversions were completed in time for the autumn detours.

Just go around the big COVID Obstruction, then straight through the Bicycle Virtue-Signalling Snafu, where 5000 traffic cones have produced cycling lanes, but reduced miles of four-lane major streets to two-lane parking lots.

Seating in beer tents will be every third chair, and special Pandemic masks, with little holes to drink beer through straws will be provided.

Extra test kits, and extra hospital staff, will be on hand.  Have fun, but stay safe.  👿

***

I published a post some years ago, https://archonsden.wordpress.com/2012/07/30/you-cant-get-there-from-here/ with the above title, describing traffic problems on local streets, which were laid out by cattle, rather than surveyors.  The City has gotten bigger, but so have the traffic problems.

Last year, we had 700,000 people attend Oktoberfest in 9 days.  At this time, the 2020 Oktoberfest is still a go. with – what is hoped are – sufficient safeguards.  There will be no parade, and fest-halls will not be as crowded as elevators.  The Oktoberfest Committee seem to be hoping that COVID – rather than a chunk of the population – will be dead by Canadian Thanksgiving, or a vaccine available.

My home is out on the West side of town, so that prevailing winds should blow any infection away from me.  I’ve installed HEPA filters on the air intakes, and won’t be leaving the house for over a week.  😆

***

Go to Rochelle’s Addicted to Purple https://rochellewisoff.com/ site and use her Wednesday photo as a prompt to write a complete 100 word story.

24 thoughts on “Flash Fiction #235

  1. Bill says:

    I’ve always loved that phrase, “You can’t get there from here.” I admit that reading your excellent story resulted in some anxiety. Well done.

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  2. I, for sure can’t get there from here. I have to wait till 31.12.20 before I can travel out of this country. We’re still under the RMCO (Restricted Movement Control Order). Wow..700,000 people in 9 days. Oktoberfest is not a popular celebration here and soon it will not exist anymore due to the Muslim law. But I would love to experience an Oktoberfest parade one day. (.=^・ェ・^=)

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    • Archon's Den says:

      (Perhaps) it will be available on TV next year, but I’m not a sufficient nerd to know how you might access it via the internet. Television offers multiple camera views, but it doesn’t equal seeing and hearing it in person. The daughter was in it some years ago, as a standard-bearer in a teen marching band. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Rivergirl says:

    I prefer not to think about all the marvelous beer festivals I’ve missed this year, so yeah. Thanks.
    🙁

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  4. Dale says:

    Why can’t you ever get there by here?

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  5. draliman says:

    I’ve only been to OktoberFest in Stuttgart rather than the more well-known one in Munich, which is obviously cancelled this year.
    We’ve had some streets partially converted to cycle lanes too, but nowhere near me as we don’t have any large towns down here.

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    • Archon's Den says:

      In the early ’70s, the local version had more cultural feel to it. Even though the bluenoses won’t allow it to advertise as such, it’s become just a big excuse for a week-long beer-bash, drunken orgy.
      My hometown is Southampton, Ontario, Canada. How “down here” are you – Sussex? Kent? Near Midsomer? 😉 😆

      Liked by 1 person

  6. That’s a lot of people. Don’t you live in a small town?

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  7. Dora says:

    Getting “there” hardly seems like it will the same again, does it? You’ve captured the tangle we’re in through these few words.

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  8. msjadeli says:

    Depressing reality has gotten real old and it hasn’t even been 6 months yet 😦

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