The Three Italian Bears

Once upon a time, the following was read into the official minutes of an IBM stockholders meeting.  Read it aloud, in a thick, Italian accent

Die Tri Berrese

(di’sse libretto ise for dos iu laicho to follow di spicche – wait, ise spicche)

Uans appona taim uas tri berres; mamma berre, papa berre, a bebi berre.  Live inna contri nire foresta.  NAISE AUS, no mugheggia.  Uanno dei, papa,mamma enne beibe go toda biche, onie, forghetta locche di doors.  Bai enne bai commese Goldilocchese.  Sci garra nattinge tudo batte maiche troble.  Sci pushie olle fudde daon di maute; no live cromme.  Dan sci goe appesteresse enne slipse in olla di beddse.
LEISE SLOBBE!

Bai enne bai commese omme di tri berrese, olle sonne-bronde enne sand inna scius.  Dei garra no fudde, dei garra no beddse.  En wara dei goina due to Goldilocchse?  Tro erre inna strit?  Colle pulissemenne?
FETTE CIENZE!

Dei uas bietenicche Berrese, enne dei slippa on a floore.  Goldilocchese stai derre tree dase; itte aute ausenhomme, en geusta bicose dei asche erre to maiche di beddse, sci sei “GO TO ELLE,”enne runne criene to erre mamma, tellen erre uat sonnesabietches di tri berres uar.
UATSIUSE?  Uara iu goin due – Go compliene sittiole?

Respectfully dedicated to Edelwasia, who did not get a chance to publish it   😀

Thanx, H.E.

2 thoughts on “The Three Italian Bears

  1. 1jaded1 says:

    Sonnesabietches…dat uas fun. Neva forghetta locche di doors.

    Liked by 2 people

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s