He Is Not A Pleasant Fellow

I am not a very pleasant fellow – as certified by my wife.

The son often reads Quora, an online discussion forum, which has the recurring theme, “Was I The Asshole?”  I did it again – or did I??!  You be the judge.

The wife and I entered a small variety store – think Wal-Mart-Lite.  As many stores do, the entrance aisle was narrow.  Ten feet in, the store had put clothing racks on either side, narrowing traffic even more.  Two corpulent women stood, examining clothing on one rack.  Their shopping cart was crossways to traffic flow, with its nose buried in the far rack.

We, and the couple behind us, could not proceed.  I reached ahead, and moved their cart parallel to the aisle.  We all started forward.  Just as we passed, I heard one woman complain, “He’s not a very pleasant fellow, is he?”  Despite the fact that the wife insists that I need hearing aids, I heard her mutter, “No, he’s not, is he?”

Now, some of my readers might be surprised, but being voted a pleasant fellow by a random idiot bunch of total strangers is not on my list of desired goals.  Then I started thinking about the encounter.  Just what would I have had to do to be considered pleasant??!  What did I do, to deserve such denigration?

I didn’t scream or yell.  I didn’t raise my voice.  I didn’t demand.  I didn’t curse and swear. I didn’t insult either of them.  I didn’t say a word.  I didn’t even require that one of them actually move the offending obstacle.

I could have put a smile in my big, stertorous, public-speaking voice, and sweetly asked, “Could someone please take their inattentive and exasperating head out of their Fucking ass and move this piece-of-shit cart, so that I can get into this God-damned store??!

But no!  This was more like a good day at work.  No-one actually died.  There wasn’t much blood, and the flames were quickly extinguished.  What does a fellow have to do to be declared polite and pleasant, and not get voted off the island?

Now it’s your turn to vote.  Was I the asshole??  Or just a pleasant, if not totally innocent, bystander?

I’ll tabulate the ballots on Friday.  No Fibbing.  😉

9 thoughts on “He Is Not A Pleasant Fellow

  1. Rivergirl says:

    Your behavior doesn’t come anywhere near asshole status in my book. I vote no.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. jim- says:

    Im certain deep down you’re an asshole©. To be the Archon nearly demands it.
    I’m not a pheasant plucker I’m a pheasant pluckers son, I’m just here plucking pheasants til the pheasant plucker comes.


    • Archon's Den says:

      I know! I know! You’re right. 😯 That’s not how Woke works. 👿 How could I expect anyone but me to have awareness of what’s going on around them, and give a damn about the happiness and wellbeing of anyone other than themself??
      I’m sure that one of my forefathers uttered the hated “S” word…. Sassenach. I am everything that I am today, because only guys who wear skirts are privileged, and not oppressed. 😛 The wife obviously has the right (cowed) attitude – Newspeak says so. 😆

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Garfield Hug says:

    Not an asshole for sure! Asshole is reserved for my MR EX. He ticks all the boxes for being the purrfect Asshole and his name is keyed into my cellphone contact list as Asshole so that if it rings, Asshole is calling LOL!


  4. Jim Wheeler says:

    Rather than name-calling, I vote you a medal. In a world suffering from war, crime and disease, some people have their peeves way out of whack!

    Liked by 1 person

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