Remaking Fibbing Friday

Pensitivity101 said it was Time For Hit Remakes this week.  Who could have recorded the following (your nominations do not have to be singers) or had it for their signature tune?

Cinderella Rockefella

The San Francisco Boys Marching Band, with special guest Elton John, appearing on the Ru-Paul Drag Race TV show.
Not that there’s anything wrong with that!

2.   I want it all

Vladimir Putin!  😳

3.   I’m just a forlorn boy

Axe Body Spray bought the rights, and used the first eight bars in a commercial.  I’m just a lonely boy…. and showed some Incel dork looking forlorn and dateless.  Then the video moved on to show him dousing overly-liberal spraying himself with their toxic chemical miasma concoction, and suddenly he’s surrounded by 6 good-looking chicks, none of whom seem to mind the presence of the other five.

That advert campaign came to a sudden halt when released a spoof version.  It intercut portions of the original showing Young Reekie, the Axe-man, then it showed six hot females gasping for breath, and grasping for N95 COVID masks and running away, showing that they had a sense of smell, and a sense of taste – or distaste.  👿

4.   Here comes the night

The Silicon Valley Bank Senior Management Choir.  Then they do a Patreon PSA video, titled,
What Happens In LA – stays in our Golden Handshake accounts.

5.   All I have to do is dream

Any new parent, especially new mothers.  When the Terrible Twos Twins are simultaneously teething, the police are getting noise complaints from your neighbours – not about your dog, but because of the yowling young-‘uns.  They never seem to achieve unconsciousness at the same time, so sleep is just something that you read about in a book one time, long, LONG ago.

6.   Wand’rin’ Star

That was Edwin Starr, who had a hit back in ‘69 which asked, “What is the good of war?”  Putin recently sent him a text that just read, “Posterity Project.”

Then he sent me one that absolutely, positively denied that I saw a Russian ZIL that read KGB, in last week’s alphabet soup.  Good thing I don’t own a smart phone, and never got it.  🙄

I tried to listen to the Portishead version of it, but the Suicide Hotline called ME, and told me to turn it off.  😦

7.    Rock On

Tina Turner has redone this old song.  She’s 85!  With a big front veranda, (and her house has one, too) and a mint julep, it has taken on a brand new meaning.  😉

8.   Purple Rain

I have adopted this, at least temporarily, as my Life Motto.  I have absorbed so much COVID sanitizer that when I pee, I also clean the toilet.

9.   When will I see You Again?

This is the new anthem for Beijing.  Between COVID masks, and the worst air quality in the word, it’s creating a lot of identity confusion, and causing some people who want to telephone someone they think they met on the street, to Wing the Wong number.

10.  You can’t hurry love

It’s still $4.99 a minute, but when you get as old as me, sometimes you have to change the batteries in your hearing aids.
EH??  What am I wearing?  Depends!  On What??  On my crotch!  I don’t think I trust an adult incontinence product named Depends any more.  I want one called Fer Shur, or Boulder Dam.


16 thoughts on “Remaking Fibbing Friday

  1. “Purple Rain” is the music playing in the lobby of a double feature of “Red Dawn” and “Blue Thunder”.

    Putin may be singin’ “I Want It All”, but his troops are singin’ “War (What Is It Good For?)”. Or maybe “Leavin’ On A jet Plane”?

    Isn’t “You Can’t Hurry Love” what porcupine breeders sing?

    By the by, I caught a documentary on Magellan today. You know, it’s been more than 500 years since he (well, technically, his navigator) circumnavigated the globe, but we still have his problems? We’re always looking for new sails while worrying about our miles per galleon. 😉

    Liked by 3 people

    • Archon's Den says:

      I’m reading a book with a (‘bristly’) character named Porpentine. Research reveals that folks even older than me, used it as a name for porcupines. 🙄

      Liked by 1 person

      • Porpentine sounds like a chemical you’d get by crushing porcupines and letting it ferment for a century or two. “Yep, get yerself a bottle a Porpentine, an’ clean ALL dem ol’ paintbrushes you got lyin’ around”. Yikes! 😯

        I have to confess – the Purple Rain bit comes from an old comedy show, I think it was called “Fridays” on ABC, an attempt to steal SNL viewers. Though it failed horribly, it did give us Kramer on Seinfeld (Michael Richards, hope that’s his name). It did silly movie marquee combos, the only one I remember being “Red Dawn + Blue Thunder = Purple Rain”. (I love Blue Thunder, not for the helo – which is cool – but because Roy Scheider’s girlfriend gets chased all over LA in a Vega. Yes, a Chevy Vega outrunning police cruisers! THAT’S the real sci-fi in the movie! 😀 )

        Liked by 2 people

      • Archon's Den says:

        The two gerbils in the engine were on meth. 😳

        Liked by 1 person

      • Oh, trust me, there was only one gerbil in there, and he had arthritis! I drove a ’73 Vega between 1980 and 1987, when I finally got my Z-24. My Vega not only had a 2-speed autobox (slow and even slower), but you could turn the steering wheel a quarter turn without the front wheels moving. The inside and outside panels of the doors were held together with roofing cement, everything below the body line was either fibreglass or Bondo, the seats were vinyl (i.e. hot in summer, cold in winter), no A/C, and a one-speaker AM radio. El strippo! And, when you were lucky/crazy enough to wind it up to about 70mph, the body shape – a perfect Bernoulli airfoil – would cause the front wheels to lift slightly, making the steering even more vague. 😯

        God, I loved that car! (Seriously – I cried when my dad traded it in on an ’89 wagon, and the Vega was still going …. well, as strong as it ever did new. The dealer sold it to a dad looking for a first car for his daughter – for that, the Vega was PERFECT. Too slow to get into trouble, but so solid you wouldn’t get hurt short of falling off a cliff – rust and all.)

        Liked by 2 people

      • Archon's Den says:

        Back before Ralph Nader existed, the guy down the street found that his Corvair was a little light on its feet, coming around the big bend into town. He compensated by putting his scuba gear over the front wheels, but didn’t tell the kid on the other side of town, who also owned one. He took his brother and a friend to a beach dance-hall, up the windy lakefront road. It went off the road, and swapped ends when the engine came around, and slammed into a tree backwards. They found the friend, who had been lying in the backseat, (Before seatbelts) wrapped around a branch, 18 feet up a pine tree. Ah, the Good Old Days. 😦


      • Yeah, Porsche 911s and Corvairs, both with rear-drive and rear-engine, tended to snap-spin if you overcooked them into corners. Unlike front-engine front-wheel-drive cars, that simply tuck in when you take your foot off the gas.

        I’ve never had a really bad accident thank whoever. Mostly because, even though I was a bit of a leadfoot, I only screwed around when I was the only person that could be hurt. Worst accident I had was when I pulled out of a sidestreet and got the front end of my Vega bent to the right by a guy driving with one headlight out, through a turn at 20mph over the limit. Beauty of the Vega – my dad and I repaired the damage using a fence-puller ratchet to yank the body work out, then hammered the fender back into shape. A new headlight, lotsa Bondo and a paint job later, and the old Vega was back on her feet as if nothing happened. Worst damage my Z ever got was when some ditzy broad started off from a right turn bay, me following, and just as she turned onto the cross street, slammed on the brakes. Her exterior mount spare tire bracket cracked my Z’s nosepiece and bent the front fender. The shop I took it to did a crappy job, the fender started to rust, and when I had it into the dealer for a recall fix, my buddy the car salesman convinced the chief mechanic (who I knew somewhat) to redo the fender under my rust protection warranty.

        Point of that last story? When you buy a car from a dealer, befriend the guys in the back. The company that held my warranty had gone bankrupt, but because I treated the mechs with respect and friendship, they were willing to bend (heck, damn near BREAK) the rules for me! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Loved #8! Thanks for joining in with your fun answers. See you next week!!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. ghostmmnc says:

    You have some really funny answers, and I enjoyed reading them. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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