Well, let me tell you about Ahab the Arab. Or you could just click on that title, and let Crazy Ray Stevens tell the story.
Ahab claims that he snuck into Fatima’s tent, and….
There he saw Fatima layin’ on a zebra skin rug with Rings on her fingers and bells on her toes and a bone in her nose ho, ho. There she was, friends, lyin’ there in all her radiant beauty, eating on a raisin, grape, apricot, pomegranate, bowl of chitterlin’s, two bananas, three Hershey bars, sipping on a RC co-cola listenin’ to her transistor, watchin’ the Grand Ole Opry on the tube, readin’ a Mad Magazine while she sung, “Does your chewing gum lose it’s flavor? “Ahab doesn’t mention me being there, but I was. I was giving Fatima lessons in being
Having or showing a disposition to avoid exertion; slothful:
inactive or relatively benign:
slow, inactive, sluggish, torpid.
Maybe Ahab figured that I was a eunuch. Perhaps he thought that I was just another overstuffed pillow. It’s hard – literally – being indolent on a zebra-skin rug. The sand underneath is very unforgiving, and it gets into some uncomfortable places. I said to Fatima, right after she got back from giving the Sultan a lube job, that we were in Persia – try to get the Great Camel-Chaser to provide some softer Persian rugs.
There was a lot more fruit in that bowl before Fatima got back. If I’m going to be obese, I’m going to do it the healthy way. Chocolate is bad for my complexion, and R C Cola???!!…. They say that Coke can be used to remove rust from cars, but the government should stockpile R C Cola in case some of the UFOs they are studying turn out to be extraterrestrial. A high-velocity spray of that stuff can repulse aliens, and destroy their craft.
COVID shutdowns are finally being relaxed. I’m not quite as relaxed about that, but Oktoberfest is on its way, and I’m practicing my impersonation of Roll Out The Barrel. I’ll trundle back over and publish another fascinating post on Wednesday – right after I snitch another fig from that bowl. 😉