Lies My Grammar Checker Told Me

The guy who programmed my Word program Grammar Checker, must have been on some wild, non-prescription medication.  If I paid any attention to it, I’d probably end up the same way.  The suggestions – corrections – range from highly disappointing, to Oh F**k No!  I finally decided to keep a list.  Here are a few, with my corrections of Word’s ‘corrections.’

Let’s start with ‘guy’ above, which it insists on adding a comma after, sectioning my independent clause into a smaller, subordinate one.  Now it’s spotted the word ‘guy,’ and wants me to change ‘which’ to ‘whom.’

Archon: God is perfectly loving.
Word: God perfectly loves.
This changes my passive adjective into an active verb.  What He is, is not necessarily what He’s currently doing.  Now it wants me to remove the comma after the first ‘is.’  If I do that, it will want me to remove the duplicated word.

Archon: I’m okay.
Word: I is okay.
Well, I’m not okay with that verb form.

Archon: I only did one sit up
Word: I only did one sits up
I know!  It’s my fault.  I should have put a dash between sit and up.

Archon: I need another drink
Word: I needs another drink
Now I need two drinks.  Oh look, it’s changed its mind.  Oh damn, you can’t see.

Archon: the asshole who screwed you
Word: the asshole that screwed you
No, no!  If we’re going that way, it was a penis that screwed you.

Archon: Sorry man, it’s trick or treat
Word: Sorry man, its trick or treat
That one is subtle, but it burns my ass.

Archon: row, row, row your boat
Word: row, row, and row your boat
Row, row, row your silly recommendations away from me.

Archon: people always seem to know it
Word:  people always seems to know it
It doesn’t seem to know how many, the word “people,” represents.

Archon: letting myself go
Word: letting me go
I do myself.  Everybody else does me.  There’s a rule there that I can’t remember – something about reflexive.

Archon: will never see the light of day
Word: will never sees the light of day
Poor Will, his eyesight is lousy.

Archon: Just to clear things up
Word: Just too clear things up
That is too much to accept.  Dear Lord!  Now it wants to capitalize ‘Too.’

Archon: mattresses aren’t on sale
Word: mattresses isn’t on sale
Unless “Mattresses” is a book or movie, I aren’t accepting that construction

Archon: Turns out I just have kids
Word: Turns out me just have kids
Turns out me don’t trust Grammar-Check

Archon: a chocolate box, and a chocolate Lab, are
Word: a chocolate box, and a chocolate Lab, is a
One plus one equals a plural verb

Archon: it means to lift or raise
Word: it means to lift or rise
Active vs. passive – It raises a question of who writes better English.

Archon – 14 <-> Word – 0  The deterioration of English language usage is not circular.  It is a continuing, downward spiral.  ‘We’ become wrong because we listen to supposed experts, and the supposed experts are wrong because they listen to, and read, our current usage.   👿

Jack Fell Down

Jack fell down and broke his crown, and bureaucracy damn near killed him.

Actually, it was the wife who fell down.  She was just pulling up her pants after using the main-floor washroom, when her tinnitus, and other inner ear disorders upset her balance, and she keeled over backward, smacking her head against the door, and the floor.  Then followed five minutes of painful wriggling to move far enough so that the son and I could get the door open and help her up.

With COVID distancing mandates, it was three days before she even got a telephone interview with her doctor.  The doctor called at 2:00 PM.  When she heard of headaches, sleeping for 12/14 hours, and slurred speech, she suddenly insisted that we attend her clinic, immediately.

At 3:00 o’clock, she found bruising, and a droopy eye.  What we took to be a mild concussion, might be internal cranial bleeding.  She needs to know ASAP!  The city has two hospitals, but only one, shared, MRI machine.  A scheduled appointment could take weeks – too long.  She apologized, but said that, the only way to ensure an MRI today, is to go and sit in Emergency for seven hours.  Eventually, it will get done.

At 4:00 o’clock, we got the wife registered at Emerge.  It seemed simple.  Take the doctor’s work order out of the fax machine, and do the test as soon as a tech could be scheduled.  First, we waited twenty minutes to see a triage nurse.  She checked blood pressure, heart rate, blood-oxygen percentage and temperature, and directed us to the dreaded waiting room.  After another twenty minutes, another nurse showed up with a small cart, and took a blood sample for testing, and warned of a later urine sample requirement, and the need to see the on-call doctor before anything is done.

Then we settled in for the siege.  It is not first come – first served!  We know that she will be seen after the guy who slashed his fingers in a DIY accident, the woman with a bloody nose running down her face, and the young man knocked off his bicycle in traffic.  If we have to wait (and wait, and wait), at least we could enjoy the floor show.  Stupidity and larceny are in plentiful supply.

A chubby street hooker, with more ink than the New York Times, but no obvious distress, showed up.  A young homeless (?) woman, with a giant backpack and two stuffed shopping bags, managed to find a seat in the crowded room, to get out of the rain.  A young, female addict, who survived a minor overdose, stormed out and across the parking lot, still wearing the hospital’s blanket, and screaming, “Get away from me!  I don’t want to have anything to do with you!” at a boyfriend who has had enough, and is already half a block away.

Two security guards have an office with security monitors, just inside the entrance.  We caught a glimpse of them rushing outside, and chasing someone around the building.  Two male, and one female, Police officers patrol in and around the Emergency ward.  I looked for Tasers, but in tight quarters they might get grabbed.  At 6:00, I got her a coffee, and me a hot chocolate from the in-house Tim Hortons outlet, upstairs.  At 7:00 I got her a buttered tea-biscuit, and me a crème-cheese bagel.  It’s going to be a long night, and her diabetes needs to be fed.

At 8:00 a patrol-car cop brings in a young, female shoplifter.  He’s wearing a Taser, and she’s wearing handcuffs in front of her.  The wife later said that, around midnight, two cops brought in three young males involved in a bar fight, not only handcuffed behind, but also connected to ankle shackles.  One of them wailed that, He was just being paraded around, and everybody was going to know!

I had to reluctantly leave her alone at 8:30.  Our two little dogs have been locked in a cage for six hours.  The son needs the car to get to work at 10:30.  I was going to drive him across town, pick her up when she called, and drive back out to pick him up at 7:30 AM.  Already under work-stress, when he heard what was (not) happening, he took the night off, and ordered a pizza, because none of us was eating properly.

At 3:00 AM, she called to say that the (next-shift) doctor had examined her, and she was on her way to Nuclear Medicine.  At 3:45 she called to be picked up.  She entered the hospital at four PM, and finally got out at four AM.  The threatened seven-hour wait had stretched to twelve hours, for a five-minute test.  Thankfully, we now know that all is well.  Without any visible blood or injury, she still could have collapsed out of her chair at any moment.

Do you have a hospital horror story that you’d like to recount?  I will listen patiently, and commiserate.

Flash Fiction #289

PHOTO PROMPT © Alicia Jamtaas

I’M STUFFED

For those of us Baby-Boomers, and even pre-Boomers, who remember the Second World War, and perhaps the lingering results of the Great Depression, (All hail modern medicine!) many of us succumb to the Keep it.  It might be useful someday Syndrome.

Boomers are not the only ones who do it, but we’re a bit crazy.  We leave our valuable cars in front of the house, and fill our garages with junk.  As memories deteriorate, we’re not sure we still have what we search for, and usually don’t find it.

“Why am I here?  Oh yeah, to turn off the light.”

***

If you would like to join the Friday Fictioneers, go to Rochelle’s Addicted to Purple site and use her Wednesday photo as a prompt to write a complete 100 word story.

Speaking English Like An Arab

Over centuries, dozens of Arabic words have entered the English language, through science, philosophy, mathematics, food, fabrics, trade and travel.

Most were introduced by inland and maritime trade along the Silk Route, while others came through the Islamic conquests of southern Europe. Not all of these words are of Arabic origin – some came from India, Persia and ancient Greece – but Arab merchants helped export them to the West.

Finally, the discovery of medieval Islamic scientists and astronomers during the Renaissance brought new words and concepts to Europe.  I have picked the top 15 most surprising words with Arabic origins.

Admiral: amir أمير

The word for this high-ranking naval commander evolved from amir, the Arabic word for a prince or ruler. The word was first documented on the island of Sicily in the 11th century, where the Arabs had ruled for 300 years.

Alchemy: al kimiya الكيمياء

The ancient branch of philosophy known as alchemy involved the study of substances and materials. Medieval alchemists believed that some liquids could be turned to gold, or a potion that would make its drinker immortal. The original Arabic word stems from the Greek term “khemeia, though some scholars also trace its roots back to ancient Egypt.

Cotton: qutun قطن

Though cotton was known to the ancient Romans, the word and the fabric were imported by Arab merchants to Europe in the late Middle Ages.

Elixir: al-iksir الإكسير

Today, an elixir is a liquid remedy with healing powers. In Arabic, it originally referred to a dry powder for treating wounds. It was later adopted by alchemists who referred to an elixir as the elusive mineral powder that would turn metals into gold.

Jumper: jubba جبّة

The Arabic word for overcoat originally entered European languages as “juppa“, valuable silk clothing, in southern Italy in the 11th century.

Macrame: miqrama مقرمة

This type of knotted textile used in craft and high fashion originates from the hand-loomed fabrics of Arabic weavers. In Arabic, miqrama refers to an embroidered tapestry or bedspread.

Mohair: al-mokhayyar المخيّر

In Arabic, al-mokhayyar was a high-quality cloth made of fine goat hair. Various forms of it were imported to the West for centuries, the most famous being the wool made from Angora goats of Turkey.

Monsoon: mawsim موسم

Early Arab sea merchants on the Indian Ocean rim used the word “mawsim” or “seasons” to refer to the seasonal sailing winds. Later, the word was adopted by Portuguese, Dutch and English sailors as they navigated extreme weather conditions off the coasts of India, South-East Asia and China.

Muslin: musuliyin موصلي

Muslin, a cotton-based fabric, is said to have derived its name from the traders of the city of Mosul, or the musuliyin, who imported it from South Asia to Europe.

Nadir: nazir نظير

In English, a nadir refers to the worst moment, or the point at which something is of the least value. But in Arabic, the word means a counterpart, and was used in medieval Islamic astronomy to refer to the diametrically opposing points of a celestial sphere.

Orange: naranj نارنج

Though both the fruit and the word came from India, Arabs introduced oranges to the Mediterranean region. For many southern European countries today, they are considered a staple fruit.

Serendipity: serendib سرنديب

The ancient fairy tale place of Serendib, which appears in One Thousand and One Nights and other ancient oral traditions, was also the old Arabic name for the island of Sri Lanka. The English word serendipity, meaning a fortunate discovery, was coined by the English author Horace Walpole in 1754.

Safari: safar سفر

The English adopted the Swahili word for journey – safari – in the 19th century for their hunting expeditions in East Africa. Though a safari today involves an organized trip to spot wild animals, its origins are from the Arabic “safar”, or journey, a reminder of the crucial presence of Arab sea merchants on the East African coast.

Sugar: sukkar سكّر

Another word to have travelled the Silk Road is sugar, which was originally produced in India. By the sixth century, sugar cane cultivation reached Persia, and was brought into the Mediterranean by the Arabs, who produced it extensively.

Tariff: ta’riff تعريف

A tariff in Medieval Arabic means a notification. It was introduced to western languages around the 14th century through commerce on the Mediterranean Sea, where it referred to the bill of lading on a merchant ship, or the statement of products and prices for sale.

Spam Scam

When I first started blogging, I thought that I could inflate my number of posts by making fun of my spam.  I did one, then later, another, but quickly realized that everybody gets spam, and some of it is a lot more interesting than mine.

Most of the fun ones have disappeared, although I recently received these $2.39 translation program beauties.

March 9, 2019 at 7:18 am  (Edit)

very well claimed!If I recognized effectively… I can’t consider I remaining this eye-catching temperament trait out- unconditional loving compassion!!!I as soon as go through upon a bumper sticker:“Pricey God, Make sure you assist me in the direction of be the particular person my canine believes I am.”I need to don’t forget this each and every working day! Owing for the reminder.

Dear God, help me be the kind of person that my dog thinks I am.  I need to remember.  Thanks for reminding me.

And this one, about my work history:

Hello everyone, it’s my first vsit at this website, and piiece
of writing is genuinely fruitful desibned ffor me, keep up
posting such articles orr reviews.

Just look at those red underlines…. Oh wait, you can’t see them.  All those spelling and grammar mistakes – I hope it’s your last vsit…. Uh, visit.

My spam seems to have settled down to the same six remarks, attached to the same six comments, (one of them only two Emojis) on the same six (old) posts. I get dozens each day, in Spanish, which say, Muchas gracias. ?Como puedo iniciar sesion?  (Thank you very much. How can I log in?)  I regularly get a few, mostly from Hairdressing sites, which say, My goodness.  You seem to have the magic touch.  Any chance you could help me pick a lottery ticket?

A batch of identical ones has recently started pouring in, advertising an herbal treatment for deafness.  That’s about as useful as putting crystals in your car when it runs out of gas.  Only one so far, but I got a glowing, first-person-user review for Dr.(?) X’s absolutely, positively guaranteed two-week miracle cure for genital herpes.  Strangely, it did not mention the inevitable Nobel Prize in Medicine which must have followed its discovery.

I recently received a span which stood out from the rest, if only because it ran on, and on…. and on – for 7142 words.  It must have been sent out in bulk, otherwise why would the Akismet program have sieved it out?

It came from something/someone named Defense Of Israel.  I had neither the time nor patience to read it all, especially when 5% of it was in Hebrew,
ולירושלים עירך ברחמים תשוב ותשכן בתוכה כאשר דברת, ובנה אותה בקרוב בימינו בנין עולם, וכסא דוד מהרה לתוכה תכין:  ברוך אתה ה’, בונה ירושלים. את צמח דוד עבדך מהרה תצמיח, וקרנו תרום בישועתך, כי לישועתך קוינו כל היום:  ברוך אתה ה’, מצמיח קרן ישועה.

but it maundered on about the times that Israel has been invaded, the Six-Day War, Golda Meir saving the country, and how OPEC and the Arab League are working to drive the Jews back into the sea.

The author seems to feel, like the Christian Evangelicals in the USA, that the modern country is going to Hell – perhaps literally – and the only way to rescue it is to impose the strict 7 Noahide Religious laws.
Carry out justice – prohibition of any miscarriage of justice.
No blasphemy – Prohibits a curse directed at the Supreme Being.
No idolatry – Prohibits the worship of any human or any created thing. Also prohibited is the making …of idols and involvement with the occult. This necessitates an understanding of the One G‑d of Israel and His nature.
No illicit intercourse – Prohibits adultery, incest, homosexual intercourse and bestiality, according to …Torah definitions.
No homicide – Prohibits murder and suicide. Causing injury is also forbidden.
No theft – Prohibits the wrongful taking of another’s goods.
Don’t eat a limb of a living creature – Promotes the kind treatment of animal life. It also encourages an appreciation for all kinds of life and respect for nature as G‑d’s creation.

I received another – only 3300 words, complaining about Jewish dietary laws.  Apparently the writer wants to enjoy Tuna.  I can’t begin to imagine the time and energy that it took to compose and disseminate these massive missives.  I am at a loss to understand what the author felt that he would accomplish by doing so.

Apparently I now receive one of these once each month when I publish a post tagged ‘Religion.’  The most recent was a mere 1000 words about obeying the Torah, and being Jewish.  Either he’s running out of rants, finger strength, or Internet space.  Hey, leave some for the rest of us.  😯

Let’s talk about interesting spam – these ones, and any that you get.  😀

Welcome To The Neighborhood

In an attempt to attract some interest, new blogger Funny english questions – Surya’s Pages (wordpress.com) published a list of interesting questions and comments about social norms and English language use.  I replied to the following few.  The rest are at the bottom, if you want to comment on any or all.

If a poison expires; is it more poisonous or is it no longer poisonous?
Poisons do not ’expire,’ only people who take it.  Depending on the poison, it might actually become more virulent.   Some degrade, but almost none become non-poisonous.

Which letter is silent in the word “Scent,” the S or the C?
Yes!

Why is the Letter W, in English, called a double U?  Shouldn’t it be called double V?
I asked my Grade 4 teacher this in 1953.  She said,” Wait till next year when you learn cursive writing.  You’ll see that it is a double U.”  In French, it is double V – when they’re not busy surrendering to a Girl Scout troop from Iceland.

SIX GREAT UNRESOLVED CONFUSIONS – turned out to be just the next four.

At a movie theater, which armrest is yours?
Both of them, if you get there early, plant both elbows, and the Incredible Hulk doesn’t sit beside you.

If people evolve from monkeys, why are monkeys still around?
If dogs evolved from wolves, why are wolves still around?
If Protestants evolved from Catholics, why are Catholics still around?
This is the kind of “Gotcha” question that Christian Apologists with absolutely no knowledge of Evolution ask.  Monkeys do not evolve (present tense) into people.  Human beings and monkeys both evolved from a common, ape-like ancestor, millennia ago.  Some people are just more evolved than others.

Why is there a ‘D’ in fridge, but not in refrigerator?
Because the refrigerator is full, and there isn’t enough room.

Who knew what time it was when the first clock was made?
Anybody who could look up, see that the sun had reached its peak in the sky, and say, “It’s Noon!”

Why isn’t a Fireman called a Water-man?
Because he doesn’t get on that big red truck and rush to the water.  He rushes to a fire.

Why do doctors “Practice” medicine?  Are they having practice at the cost of the patients?
Because, like lawyers who “practice” law, the word has more than one meaning.  The original one was, “habit, or custom.”

Why do they call it a TV ‘set’ when there is only one?
Because it consists of an assemblage – a set – of electronic components.

What are you vacating when you go on a “Vacation?”
Your desk, your chair, your employer, your house, your municipality, and often your better judgement.

***

You’re kinda cool man. 😎
I thought that I was past “Cool.” At my age it’s mostly rants and rambles.  😳

Would you like to join me?
Why?  Are you coming apart?

This is obviously not Mr. Rogers’ neighborhood.

***

Do twins ever realize that one of them is “Unplanned”?
Maybe Oxygen is slowly killing you and it just takes 75-100 years to fully work.
Every time you clean something, you just make something else dirty.
The word “swims” upside-down is still “swims.”
(It depends on how you rotate it.  It might just be “smiws.”)
100 years ago everyone owned a Horse and only the rich had Cars. Today everyone has Cars and only the rich own Horses.
If you replace “W” with “T” in “What, Where and When”, you get the answer to each of them.
Wonder why the word “Funeral” starts with FUN?
How come Lipstick doesn’t do what it says?
If money doesn’t grow on trees, how come Banks have Branches?
If a Vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a Humanitarian eat?
How do you get off a non-stop Flight?
(The way the guy in New York did recently.  Pop open the emergency hatch, and jump down onto the runway.)
Why are goods sent by Ship called CARGO, and those sent by car, a SHIPMENT?
Why do we put cups in the “Dishwasher” and the dishes in the “Cupboard”?
(To get them clean, and then, to keep them clean.)
Why is it called “Rush Hour” when traffic moves at its slowest then?
How come Noses run and Feet smell?

The Shortcut To Blame

If you haven’t struck pay-dirt in 50 words, stop boring.  Confounded confusion!!  Many Christian Apologist debaters and essayists seem to think that a barrage of verbiage will eventually yield a nugget of truth.  This guy went wrong in a Hell of a hurry.

I get to hear “Why would God allow so much suffering?” to which the answer is “Why do you?” because we really are supposed to be instruments of God, suffering is our call to action. We are supposed to take care of each other. Failing to do so is not God’s inaction, it is ours.

Damn! I didn’t realize that child cancer was My Fault, because I haven’t rushed out and found a cure. I was busy, helping out down at the food bank. 😳

Thank you. I considered editing this piece to include your sanctimonious, self righteous bullshit as an example of someone trying to highlight the “I” in “Team.” Your self centered value signalling (sic) pretty much removes the illusion of you being a charitable person.

You did a good thing, then complained that your effort did not cure all the world’s problems. It must make you feel like a failure among Gods.

And then out came all that Christian love and acceptance.  😯  Trust a Bible-thumper to take things the wrong way, whether innocently or cynically, whenever their claims are questioned,.  I’ll admit that I was a little snarky when I posted the comment that showed that there’s no He on his team: that after the writer has done all his tithing, and volunteering at the soup kitchen or homeless shelter, it’s still up to his imaginary God to handle things like tornadoes and hurricanes and floods and earthquakes and landslides and volcanoes….and cancer.

Science and medicine are working as hard as they can to find cures for diseases (like COVID19), that his God hurls at us.  After these researchers work their asses off, sometimes for years to find a cure, guys like this will yell, “Thank God! He has answered our prayers!” God helps them that help themselves. These Apologists help themselves – or, at least their pet Deity – to all the credit, but none of the blame. 😯

Here’s a clear example of my earlier assertion, which many of these Good Christians grudgingly admit, that I/Atheists perform ‘good and moral’ actions, but claim that we do so for ‘the wrong reasons,’ according to them.

Studies seem to indicate that, overall, Christians are happier than Atheists.  I don’t believe that these Apologists are actually happier, just more smugly self-satisfied.  😛

Get A Grip

I have a gripe with English.  It is said that a man with a watch always knows what time it is.  A man with two watches is never sure.  For a word with one meaning, or even several established meanings, I know what is meant.  For words which keep adding, subtracting, and modifying meanings, I am less and less sure what is meant.

The word ‘grip’ originally meant, a grasp, a grab, a hold, by a person’s hand.  Recently, technology has included machines.  Once upon an archaic, the words ‘grip’ and ‘gripe’ meant the same thing.  (Don’t ask me why.  I can’t get a hold on it.)  Now grip can mean a small suitcase with a handle, which can be grasped and carried by one hand.  Gripe can be a nagging complaint by someone who may not have a firm grip on reality.

At one time, ‘grippe’, which is pronounced grip, but which is neither grip nor gripe, was the word to identify influenza, the ordinary, seasonal, gastro-intestinal flu,’ a kinder, gentler, distant relative to COVID.  “Grippe” could cause abdominal cramps, especially among babies and young children.

To alleviate these symptoms, “Grippe Water” was developed and marketed.  My mother dosed me with it several times.  The original formula contained alcohol and sugar in addition to sodium bicarbonate and dill oil – a couple of stomach calmers, some calories to replace what might have been lost to the illness, and a mild sedative to aid with sleeping.  It was once said that the best remedy for a colicky baby, was a good, thick, oak door.

Then the All-Or-Nothing, Save Us From Ourselves, Snowflakes got a grip on it, and removed all the “bad” ingredients, so present-day products do not contain alcohol or sugar, but may contain fennel, ginger, chamomile, cardamom, licorice, cinnamon, clove, dill, lemon balm or peppermint, depending on the formula.

Grippe’ was what caused the cramping, but ‘gripe’ is the term for the actual clutching, grasping intestinal pain.  Since the formula was changed, the name has also been changed.  ‘Grippe Water’ is no more, and the new product is ‘Gripe Water.’  That’s only one of the English terms that I have a gripe about.  😯

Time For More One-Liners

Every time I ask what time it is….
….I get a different answer

I tried to come up with a joke about social distancing….
….This is as close as I could get.

Before they invented drawing boards….
….What did they go back to?

I crossed an alligator with a homing pigeon….
….That will come back to bite me

I hate it when the voices in my head go silent….
….I never know what those fuckers are planning

I was going to have wine and cheese for dinner….
….but I remembered that I can’t have cheese.  Cheers!

I was sitting in traffic the other day….
….That’s probably why I got run over.

My favorite word is “Drool.”….
….It just rolls of the tongue.

My family tree is a cactus….
….There’s a bunch of pricks

They say that laughter is the best medicine…
….but sometimes, a good sleep is better for you

When does a Dad joke become a Dad joke?….
….When it becomes apparent.

How many Optometrists does it take to change a light bulb?….
….Is it one or two??  One….or two?

This wasn’t exactly what I had in mind….
….said the patient to the brain surgeon

Yesterday I changed a light bulb, crossed the street, and walked into a bar….
….My life is a joke

I have an inferiority complex….
….but it’s not a very good one.

I’m trying this new, all-sugar diet….
….It’s pretty sweet

I went on a once-in-a-lifetime vacation….
….Never again

Did you hear about the guy who broke his leg tap dancing?….
….He fell off the sink.

I picked up a hitchhiker….
….You have to if you hit them.

I bought a dog from a locksmith today….
….As soon as I got it home, it made a bolt for the door.

Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers?….
….He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them

A minister, a priest, and a rabbit walk into a blood bank….
….The rabbit says, “I think I might be a Type-O.”

What do you call a fly with no wings?….
….A walk.

Guess who I bumped into on my way to get my glasses fixed….
….Everybody!

My boss hates it when I shorten his name to Dick….
….Especially since his name is Steve.

No matter how cynical you become….
….It’s never enough to keep up.

My neighbors listen to some really wild music….
….They have to.

Always give 110%….
….unless you’re a statistician

Flash Fiction #26 – Summer Rerun

Hollywood

PHOTO PROMPT -Copyright-Rochelle Wisoff-Fields

I had a WOW composed, Just In Case, but Rochelle has once again, kindly proffered a prefabricated excuse for the creatively challenged.

It All Comes Out In The End

Rob honey?!  Come have a look at this.  We saved hard enough for this Hollywood trip; you should come and enjoy it.  Just look at the people – and the palm trees – and the….  ROB!!?….  What was that….?

What was the name of that stuff we saw advertised back in Illinois, that’s supposed to prevent ‘travellers’ diarrhea’?  Duckitall??  Dukerol!!  I thought that was just if you went to, like, Thailand.  I didn’t know about a bad fish taco in Redlands.

You go ahead with that walking tour of the homes of the stars.  My tour’s going to be sitting.

***

Go to Rochelle’s Addicted to Purple site and use her Wednesday photo as a prompt to write a complete 100 word story.

friday-fictioneers-badge-web

I saw Dukerol advertised a couple of days before the original challenge, so I worked it into this Flash Fiction.  In the six years since, I have never heard it mentioned again.  😳