Indoor Golf

Golf Pin

Golfers might want to ‘brush up’ on the rules:

  1. Each player shall furnish his own equipment
    for play, normally one club and two balls.
  2. Play on course must be approved by the owner
    of the hole.
  3. Unlike outdoor golf, the object is to get
    the club in the hole and keep the balls out.
  4. For most effective play, the club should
    have a firm shaft. Course owners are permitted
    to check shaft stiffness before play begins.
  5. Course owners reserve the right to restrict
    club length to avoid damage to the hole.
  6. Object of the game is to take as many
    strokes as necessary. When the owner is
    satisfied, the play is complete. Failure to
    do so may result in being denied permission
    to play again.
  7. It is considered bad form to begin playing
    the hole immediately upon arrival.
    Experienced players will normally take time to
    admire the entire course, paying special
    attention to well formed mounds and bunkers.
  8. Players are cautioned not to mention other
    courses they have played or are currently
    playing, to the owner of the course being played.
    Upset owners have been known to damage players
    equipment for this reason.
  9. Players are encouraged to have proper rain
    gear, just in case.
  10. Players should not assume that the course
    is in shape to play at all times. Players may be
    embarrassed if they find the course temporarily
    under repair. Players are advised to be extremely
    tactful in this situation. More advanced players
    will find alternate means of play when this is
    the case.
  11. Players should assume their match has been
    properly scheduled, particularly when playing a
    new course for the first time. Previous players
    have been known to become irate if they discover
    someone else is playing what they considered a
    private course.
  12. The owner of the course is responsible for
    the pruning of any bushes, which may reduce the
    visibility of the hole.
  13. Players are strongly advised to get the
    owner’s permission before attempting to play the
    backside.
  14. Slow play is encouraged, however, players
    should be prepared to proceed at a quicker pace
    at the owners request.
  15. It is considered an outstanding performance,
    if time permitting, to play the same hole several
    times in one match.

***

Sexual Innuendo

 

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April A to Z Challenge – Eh

April Challenge

When is an April A to Z Challenge not an April A to Z Challenge?  When it’s a Frank Sinatra April Challenge!  I’m going to accept this challenge, but, as usual, I’m going to do it my way.

Frank Sinatra

There is no way that I could ever write and post 26 alphabetical blogs in one month, especially with weekly Flash Fictions and other time-sensitive thoughts. I am going to try to post them from April to April.  Every couple of weeks, I’ll slip one in among my regularly scheduled insanity/inanity.  I’m already 2 weeks behind, so here’s number one.  (This is alphabetical. Shouldn’t that be letter A??!)  😯

Letter A

Advent – a coming into place, view, or being; arrival:

Arrival- the reaching or attainment of any object or condition:

April – from Latin ‘aprilis’, meaning to open (up)

Articulation – using language easily and fluently; having facility with words:

All four of these words fit into this post. Since this is the first in a, hopefully completed, series, this is my advent.  I finally got my ass off my keyboard, and applied my fingers.

Since the definition of ‘advent’ includes the word ‘arrival’, I’ll mention it also.  The definition above includes the terms reaching and attainment, almost unintentionally implying completion.  I’m still 25 words away from completion of this project, but I have reached the starting line and attained a mission.

Speaking of starting lines….Why are comedians making ‘end of the world’ jokes like there’s no tomorrow?

April, the month, and the name, is a good time to ‘open up’ this series.

I like to think that I have articulation – ease of language usage and fluency, having facility with words.  While I still possess these, I avoid being placed in a facility with wards.

Articulation has another meaning also, involving bones and joints and physical movement. More and more, I find myself using handicap parking spots, even when I’m alone in the car, because the arthritis pain in my right hip is increasing.  I can’t drive with my wallet in my right ass pocket.  I have a gay fanny-pack for summer, and an inside pocket in my leather jacket for cold weather.

I wondered if I’d forgotten how to put socks on, because I was finding the front seam balled up under my toes, like walking on a pen. When I paid more attention, I found myself walking duck-footed on the right side to ease the ache, putting pressure on the foot from a non-standard direction, causing the sock to slip and bunch.

What? You expected more?  That’s it for today!  Come Back later, for Bigger, Better Blogs.