Flash Fiction #43

Brass band











 ©David Stewart

Tuba Or Not Tuba

“We can’t all be first-violinists!  Someone has to push wind through the tuba.”

“Take it easy, Bob.  We’re just a little brass band.  There are no first-violinists, and you’re the blowhard who volunteered to play the tuba.”

“Okay everyone, I know this is our first actual public concert, but we’ve been rehearsing for weeks.  You guys are ready; I know you are.”

“I’ll tell you what though, if any of you are unsure that you can do it, just fake the motions until you feel comfortable to join in.”

The conductor dropped his baton….and was greeted with a crashing silence.


Got to Rochelle’s Addicted to Purple site and use her Wednesday photo as a prompt to write a complete 100 word story

37 thoughts on “Flash Fiction #43

  1. That’s hilarious, Archon. 😀 — Suzanne


  2. gahlearner says:

    LOL They need to work on their confidence. Great story. 🙂


  3. Danny James says:

    I spent the last summer in a small town in Vermont that had just such a band. Still laughing.



  4. BrainRants says:

    Sounds like some of my experiences, albeit none of them musical.


  5. Sightsnbytes says:

    back in high school, I was quite the Triangle player. They even let me play the cowbell once!! Nice story


    • Archon's Den says:

      Is that what they call the ‘rhythm method?’ 😕 🙄

      I’m about halfway through ‘The Tomb,’ the first Repairman Jack book. I knew it was written in 1984, so I couldn’t understand references to I-Pods, CD players, and a 6-foot flat-screen. When I looked closer, I found I had the ‘Author’s Definitive Version’, rewritten in 2004 and originally re-released, titled Rashoki. 😯


  6. ansumani says:

    Funny story!


  7. Silence is golden but not from a band… great one!


  8. I was afraid this was going to happen when the conductor gave them permission! Funny – only not when you expect a little bit more from your band.


  9. Margaret says:

    They could have made use of a CD backing track to cover the silences. Funny.


  10. dmmacilroy says:

    Dear Archon,

    Music to the public’s ears. Great story and illustrative of what happens when no one steps forward to lead.




  11. Dear Archon,

    Now there’s an honest group of musicians. Classy title. Good story.




  12. mjlstories says:

    Had the opposite experience as a spectator at my first proper football/soccer match – realised my daughter and I were the only ones in the entire away-supporters’ stand holding on the last note of one of the (relatively clean) chants, like we were in the church choir.
    Lovely story!


  13. LOL, time for a rethink. Very funny, enjoyed this 🙂


  14. Taygibay says:

    Are you taking potshots at motivational speakers, Archon?

    😉 Nice one, drew a sincere laugh, Tay.


  15. Great title, great story! I loved it! I may also have been a suspiciously silent player of the synthetic tuba on the keyboard at a one week summer camp where I didn’t know I was going to be in a band concert…my volume was turned all the way down.


  16. Oh my, you made me laugh. Again. Thank you!


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