Last week, Pensitivity101 was offering up familiar words and asking for alternative definitions.
1. What is a nincompoop?
Is it a person with constipation?? 😕 I don’t give a shit.
2. What is a Tory?
He’s the privileged, rich-bitch, British Prime Minister who doesn’t have the Grit to do what is best for the country.
3. What is a gonk?
Gonk is the term for some of the (mostly) male students I attended school with. Back in the Neolithic Age, there were no special schools for them to attend, or special short buses to get them there. They just disappeared into the special Opportunity Class.
4. What is a pom-pom?
That’s the butt on any of the Kardashians. I don’t know why people have started calling them “booty.” Booty comes in a big chest – and that’s on the other end.
5. What is a hanging basket?
That’s the shot by an NBA player, that jams between the rim and the backboard, and refuses to fall in.
6. What is micropore?
It’s a short shot, dispensed by a cheap thrifty Scottish barkeep. Och laddie, yuv had enuf already anyway,.
7. What is a posy?
It’s a really difficult question to answer.
8. What is a barometer?
It’s a new, computer program that my local just installed. They don’t worry about last call anymore. I had to have a QR code tattooed on. I scan in when I arrive, and the electronic nanny keeps track of my time spent, beers ordered, and a call from the wife automatically gets me sent home to put the bins out.
9. What is a cable?
It’s a fancy, standout stitch that the wife is putting on a sweater for the Great-grandson, using yarn that the daughter hand-spun from Dorset sheep wool.
10. What is a fib?
It’s the lie that you get from the Beyond Meat company, when they claim that their plant-based pork-rib substitute is as good as the real thing. At least it isn’t Soylent Green. 😮 I was seriously distraught when I researched that old movie, and found out that there really is a company named Soylent Canada. What genius named that one?? It’s like finding that someone actually built a Jurassic Park 😳 What could possibly go wrong?? 😕
Archon's Den 
Don’t forget that the particular Tory pictured is an imported carpetbagger, married to huge money, who thinks the most patriotic thing to do is leave the last D-Day Commemoration where originally serving soldiers will still be alive, to go home and do a campaign interview. I absolutely HATE the Liberals, and I hope they positively CREAM those idiot Tories. (So, how’s Brexit going, ya morons?!?)
A posy is what you find in your pocket. Usually after those cute little rings around the rosy appear. Now what could possibly go wrong in that sweet little nursery rhyme? 😉
Oh, and a fib is the second crunch you hear when your shin impacts something at too high a speed. The first is the tib – tibia and fibula. Mind you, when you do it, you’re not remembering your physiology, you’re just trying to scream as loudly as possible. 😀
And in conclusion, bless you, my son, for finally seeing the light and rendering a graven image of our beloved St. Jerome. Blessings be upon your knucklehead. Now bow your head and say the Prayer of St. Jerome with me: “Whoo whoo whoo, nyuk nyuk nyuk. Oh, a wiseguy, eh?”
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Me, ‘wise’??? More like, Why’s he still yammerin’, when he don’t know what he’s talkin’ about?? 😕
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Ah, but the wise man keeps his mouth shut while the fool opens his and removes all doubt. And the yammerer, at least in this country, becomes President or anchor of a major network news evening show.
So when do you start with CNN? Or shall I just refer to you as Mr. President? (Oh, wait, you ain’t old enough to be President. You have to be thiiiiiiiiiiiiis old to be President, and we got two farts with seniority ahead of you! 😀 )
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Ha. My favorites are #6 and #8.
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For a non-drinker, I seem to have had booze strongly on my mind. Friends and relatives…?? 😕
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No doubt. Repressed desires?
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Similar idea with #5 and like Judy, loved #6 and #8.
Thanks for playing along again. see you next week. (Have responded to email, thanks!)
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