Alphabetic Fibbing Friday

Last week, Pensitivity101 said that it was time for an A B C.
Definitions for these words please (but your responses can start with any letter):

1. Abomasum

I just didn’t have the stomach to dream up a silly definition for this word.  It’s not like I’m some dumb cow, just delivering on demand.

2. Absquatulate

That’s the workout procedure that the wife is trying to get me to do.  My idea of exercise is a good, brisk sit.  ”Overweight” is what hangs past my belt.

3. Amphisbaena

This is a child’s – and sometimes adults’ – unreasonable aversion to taking a bath.

4. Antimacassar

Composed mostly of wives who are not allowed to accompany their husbands to the pub, this is an action group which is trying to prevent Scottish men from making drunken fools of themselves.  😮  As if!  Might as well try to legislate that the sky is green.

5. Atingle

The wife claims that I’m not a very good DIY electrician.  Well, she’s in for a shock.

6. Bailiwick

Bailiwick is the brand name of the pail-sized citronella candles that Canadian campers use to ward of backwoods mosquitoes that are big enough to molest seagulls.

7. Bafflegab

Any of Donald Trump’s speeches or Tweets.  (Do we call them Xs now??)  Comprestand??!  Covfefe!  😮

8. Calliope

This is a stew from Kenya, which the wife discovered the recipe for. It’s delicious, but a little difficult to get the gnu meat for.

9. Cornucopia

That’s the college that the wife’s podiatrist went to.

10. Cryptozoology

This is the modern collection of the strange and weird, NFT, digital, online creatures.  You have to pay with Bitcoin, to be allowed to view them.

***

So, what are you doing for Easter??

Oh, just hangin’ around.

Flash Fiction #172

PHOTO PROMPT © Jilly Funell

BIRD BRAIN

I think that my pouter pigeon would make a great presidential candidate.  He couldn’t be worse than the one we have now.

He could be the bird brain who struts around on his tiny hands feet, with his chest puffed out, thinking that he was God’s gift to all females.  He would be the unending source of incomprehensible tweets.

He’d constantly have Washington, and the world, all aflutter, and produce lots of unintelligible noise and great streams of bullshit guano.  Dab a little cheese sauce on his head, and the average American MAGA voter would elect him in a second.

***

Go to Rochelle’s Addicted to Purple site and use her Wednesday photo as a Prompt to write a complete 100 word story.