Book Review #29

Constantly curious about what Theists believe, but more importantly, WHY, I recently took advantage of the offer of three free books of explanation.  One was an actual printed paperback, while the other two were pdf downloads.

The books:
What Time Is Purple?
Answering Atheism
Proof of God

The Authors:
Tom Hammond
A blogger who only identifies as A Bit Of Orange

The reviews:
Nothing new – Same-old, same-old!  They disappointed equally, and to the same degree as all previous similar publications.

The purple book was a tiny, but expensive artifact – thick, glossy cover, only 46 thick, glossy pages, illustrations.  A copy was mailed to me from Maryland, by a blogger who calls himself HillFaith (Good News for Congressional staff).

The author began by inviting us on a journey to discover Truth.  A little reading quickly showed that all he really wanted to do was to find, or fabricate, evidence that somehow made his beliefs and presuppositions appear to be true.  That is not the same thing!

Even his title shows his prejudice.  The very fact that someone could question his unsupported claims was so alien to his vigorously-held, religious worldview, that he found it as strange as asking, “What Time Is Purple?”  Again and again, he would make unfounded statements and claims, and be bewildered that others would not simply accept them.

Bitter Mr. Orange Rind was no different.  His biggest, and constant, complaint/claim was that those rascally Atheists, Agnostics and Dictionaries – would not go along with his definitions and descriptions, so that he could blow those strawmen away.  He wanted to know what the number 5 smelled like.  They must all read from the same script/prayer book.  From his own, homemade, definitions, he fabricates claims about Atheists like, “Also, most of them manage to confuse Islam with Catholicism and attack the one with descriptions of the other.”

Like a short row of dominoes, he set up six, sequential premises to prove God.  Premise 1: God must exist by necessity – therefore premise 2 – therefore premise 3 – therefore premise 4 – therefore premise 5 – therefore God exists.  If you begin your circular argument with an unfounded claim that God exists, of course you’ll end up with that as an unsupported conclusion.

If you start with the assumption that Hillary Clinton is running a child sex-trafficking ring out of the basement of a cheap pizza joint, of course you’ll prove that it’s tr….  Oh, wait.  That one could be investigated, and was proved false.  When I ran into Nietzsche, Adolph Hitler, Hillary Clinton, Democrats, and Atheists, all in the same sentence, I was sure of who and what he was.  He apparently named his Bible-thumping blog-site after his favorite superhero.

He wanted Atheists to admit that they couldn’t be absolutely, positively, 100% sure that no God exists, so that he could stick the thin edge of his Christian arguments in.  I find the likelihood of God/gods to be slightly less than the existence of a square circle, owned by a polygamous bachelor.  If he can produce one of those, I will help him locate and present his God.

He kept making blanket claims that, (All) Atheists say this, Atheists believe that, Atheists claim….  While some – a few confused, uneducated Atheists make unsupported statements, I have never, personally, encountered any Atheist who said what he implies that ALL Atheists do.  He writes that, By necessity, Atheists must be Nihilists, but when observed reality clearly contradicts his view, he merely inverts his claim, and insists that Atheists do not really exist.

My Dad told me the tale of the Ginchee Bird, which flies around in ever-decreasing circles, until it disappears up its own ass.  I wish some of these Apologists would disappear up their own asses.  They pull out enough shit.  There should be room.  Ah well, it was cheap entertainment.  All I learned was that they were both charter members of the Lying For Jesus Movement.

If they worked half as hard at proving their claims to be true, as they do to try to prove others wrong, they might not be quite so desperate, but my past history has shown that that result seems to be impossible. I think they know that, and don’t want to admit it – but that’s the same argument they use against Atheists.  Damn the counter-arguments!  Full assumption ahead.  😳

Dr. Who’s Questions

The Doctor (He doesn’t say, ‘of what.’) claims that he just wants to ask some respectful questions of Atheists – no trick or gotcha ones.  He wants to amass the information, and sift and sort it, to produce a published report.  When asked when he might submit it, and to whom, he was delightfully vague.

He and his wife were Atheists, until each of them had a revelation from the Christian God, and they became Jews For Jesus.  His questions natter on and on – and on, full of presuppositions and leading statements.  Another blogger graciously simplified the list, although I included part of his number six, for context and clarity.  I thought I’d have a go at them.

  • Is Your Atheism Based on Study or Experience? …

Yes!, to both.  As young as seven or eight, I regarded stories that started with “In The Beginning” to be no more believable than those that began, “Once Upon A Time.”  I didn’t realize until I became an adult myself, that other children, and adults, took them seriously.  I became curious enough to begin a long-term investigation.  I spent a great deal of time looking at arguments for or against God’s existence, and eventually had to conclude that there just wasn’t any evidence for God that stood up to examination.

  • Do You Have Purpose and Destiny? …

Yes.  I have had many ‘Purposes,” and will probably have more before I die, but each of them was created and affixed by me, or those close to me, not by some supernatural entity.  I believe that I have a destiny.  It’s just that I am not enough of a fortune-teller to see far enough into the future to get a clear glimpse of what it might be.

  • Does God Exist? …

This might seem a strange question to be asking of Atheists.  In the original long-winded version, he wanted Atheists to provide total, complete, 100% proof, that there was absolutely no chance that God exists.  This is the philosophical equivalent to home invasion.  There are almost no things that can be utterly proved not to exist.  He appeared to want a tiny gap, where he could wedge his definition of God into.  I consider the possibility of God existing, only slightly more likely than the existence of a married bachelor.

  • Can Science Explain the Origin of Life? …

Science has explained the origin of life!  There is one major, largely-accepted (by biologists and related scientists) theory, and a couple of minor variations.  They all entail the chemical soup present in early Earth seas, with geothermal energy and solar radiation fueling and mutating the chemical reactions, until self-replicating RNA strands evolved upward to cells and DNA.  All that free energy powered the increasing DNA complexity.

  • Have You Questioned Your Atheism? …

Constantly and continuously!  I have never been convinced that I can’t be wrong.  Over the years I have done considerable reading and study.  Now, with YouTube, I can watch debates and lectures.  Atheism is merely the lack of belief in God/gods – the failure by theists to provide sufficiently convincing evidence.  (See above) With all the research and investigation that I have done, I continue not to be convinced that God is guilty of existing.

  • Are You Materialistic? …
    Are you completely materialistic in your mindset, meaning, human beings are entirely physical, human consciousness is an illusion, and there is no spiritual realm of any kind?

First, a pedantic language lesson, I think that phrasing should be ‘are you a materialist?’. ‘Materialistic’ refers to someone who prioritizes obtaining money and possessions!  I believe that humans, and all else within our Universe, are material.  I don’t think it makes much sense to say that consciousness is an illusion.  I think a more accurate phrasing of the materialist position on consciousness would be that it’s the product of material things/physical laws.  I continue to see no evidence of a spiritual realm of any kind, except in the hopes and dreams of the gullible.  I do not believe in tarot, Ouija boards, crystals, ghosts, mind-reading, fortune-telling, or a miracle-producing God.

  • Would You Be Willing to Follow the God of the Bible?

It depends which part of the Bible you’re talking about when you say ‘God of the Bible’.

From reading the earlier part of the Old Testament, I remember a god laden with petty jealousy, orchestrating hideous mass deaths, with archaic views on rape and slavery and some strange gaps in his scientific knowledge. The existence of this god would be bad news.

In the later part of the Old Testament, I glimpsed a different and better kind of god; the god of Ezekiel 18 and similar passages, expecting us to take personal responsibility but also willing to see our virtues and our efforts and to judge us fairly. The existence of this god would be good news, and, yes, I would follow and honor him.

In the New Testament, we get the most hideous god of all; the one who condemns all non-Christians to an eternity of torment, who blames the Jews for sticking to the laws that He himself strictly instructed them to keep to forever, who expects us to overlook the ways he acted back in the early books, and who tries to convince us that all these things are really signs of great love and concern on his part. The existence of this god would be terrible news. And, to answer the question, I could never honor such a god, and while I suppose I’d follow him because ‘Or burn in hell’ isn’t really much of an option, it would never be willingly.

Eight Ways To Be Wrong About Atheists

The quickest and surest way, is to not actually engage with Atheists.  Don’t talk to them, debate them, or ask them questions.  Don’t listen to, or accept, their answers and explanations.  Just keep spouting groundless religious claims that you inherited from someone else.  Be like this guy, who had

Eight Reasons Not To Be An Atheist

  1. An atheist assigns himself to life with merely finite purposes

His first claim is full of the presupposition of choice and rebellion.  If indeed, God does not exist, then finite purposes are all that there are.  His further claim that even Atheists feel that there is something bigger than them – something outside them – still doesn’t prove that IT is God.  A little concrete evidence of His existence might change that.

  1. The atheist must also suppress the demands of logic

Again, we see the presupposition from Something complex must have been designed, to, A design requires a designer, so, The designer must have been God.  None of these three claims are necessarily true, and do not necessarily follow one another.  A large mirror, dropped on a concrete floor, will produce an amazingly complex result, with no designer.  Apologists like this don’t even understand Logic, unless it works in their favor.

  1. Yet, ironically, the atheist has to believe in miracles without believing in God

Here, he trots out the old, tired, often-refuted Kalam Cosmological Argument, saying that everything that begins to exist must have a cause.  Since he doesn’t have enough imagination, and scientific understanding, he can’t (and doesn’t want to) think of any alternative, so he plugs in God as the only option.

Physicists have posited several theories for the existence of the Universe.  Constant energy infusion into a bubble of the Meta-verse may have caused it to shit spit out our local representation.  Since Time only came into existence with the coalescence of Matter, there was never a Time when the Universe did not exist.  Therefore, it is possible for the Universe to have a finite past – yet to have existed infinitely – no God required.

  1. An atheist must also suppress all notions of morality

Why??!  Just because he says so??!  Most Atheists make no claims about morality, because it is a term that has been co-opted by Christians.  Atheists have ethics and empathy.  The Christian God of the Bible – the archetype of their moral values – not only permitted, but encouraged, murder, rape, torture, forced marriage, genocide, racism and slavery.  Good Christians and their morals clog prisons, rehab centers and divorce courts.  I want nothing to do with Christian morals.

  1. In fact, the atheist must conclude that evil is an illusion

So, if Atheism is valid, there are no real evils, just violations of human customs or conventions. How hard would it be to think of murderers as merely having bad manners?

Evil” is indeed, an illusion, one believed in by most Christians.  It does not exist as a distinct entity.  For any given situation, there are different possible series of actions.  Some will be more beneficial to an individual, and the Human race as a whole.  Others will reduce individual and group happiness and well-being.

Drinking battery acid – or Ivermectin – may not be “evil,” but it will not produce the most good.  Neither will murder.  It is far more than mere ‘bad manners.’  I know of no Atheist who would claim it was.  I am appalled that this Christian Apologist would do so.

  1. The atheist must also live with the arrogance of his position

His assertion that there is no God requires that he pretend to possess total knowledge.

That is why Apologists get so upset when Atheists insist that they simply don’t believe because they have not been presented with convincing evidence.  For the Christian, it’s like punching a fogbank, so they lie pretend that Atheists say things that most of us don’t.  For many Christians, their religion is their life.  Despite their protestations, they aren’t half as upset that we don’t believe in their God, as they are when they find that we don’t believe in them.

  1. The atheist must also deny the validity of historical proof

The extensive manuscript evidence of eyewitnesses to the resurrection is presented in an unbiased, authentic manner.

Yeah, right??!  Pull the other one.  Four Gospels that don’t agree with each other, and one author who wasn’t there, but who claims that 500 people saw the risen Christ – only – that’s all there is, one man’s claim.  There is no list of names, or where/how many places, this occurred.  There are not 500 sworn affidavits, just a vague assertion.  I couldn’t get someone convicted of double-parking with that quality of evidence.

  1. Finally, atheists must admit that humans are not importantly different from other animals

And there you have it, ladies and gentlemen, that desperate, ego-driven need to feel special.  Humans are like, and different from, other animals in a variety of ways, and to a range of degrees.  Science is finding that species like whales and dolphins and apes and chimpanzees are remarkably human-like in many ways.  I’d like to drop him in the middle of the Serengeti, near a pride of hungry lions, and let him explain to them, just how important he is.

The atheist’s problem with belief in God is not an absence of evidence but suppression of it.
Citation needed!  Many well-known Atheists were priests, preachers, seminarians, and evangelicals.  Reputable polls show that, on average, Atheists know more about the Bible and the Christian faith, than most Christians do.  Their ‘evidence’ is not being suppressed.  It is being dismissed as unproven, and unconvincing.

Another Pot Of Christian Tea

Portions of my June Anti-Religion rant were downloaded and republished by a different Christian apologist, with many of the same, silly, baseless arguments.

Woke Atheist Insists, “You have to accept it” | Shadow To Light (wordpress.com)

Woke Atheist insists, “We Just Have To Accept”

Archon’s Den replied:

Personal feelings, personal testimony, personal experience, intuition, etc. do NOT count as evidence, when applied to something outside yourself.  They are, however, the only valid way to know what is happening in anyone’s mind.  Lia could state that she is a Cincinnati Reds fan, a non-smoker, a vegetarian, and likes heavy metal music, and you have to accept that.  And if she says that she feels more like a girl than a guy despite the plumbing, just as she feels more like voting for Biden than Trump – that’s an objective proof.  You have to accept it, even if you are a dyed-in-the-wool Republican.  She is, and will remain, the best judge of what she thinks, feels, and believes.  She identifies as a female personality, trapped in a male body.

Did you notice that,” if she says that she feels more like a girl than a guy despite the plumbing, ….that’s an objective proof.  You have to accept it.”

No, it’s not an objective proof and I don’t “have to accept it.”  There are two common traits among human beings – deception and delusion.  It is NOT uncommon for people to lie nor is it uncommon for people to be deluded (have beliefs that don’t match reality). Therefore, it is possible that Thomas is lying, and if that is not the case, it is possible that Thomas is deluded. Archon’s Den would have us abandon these possibilities, as if they could never ever be true, and instead embrace Thomas’s claims on blind faith.

Let me demonstrate the complete absurdity of Archon’s Den’s position with a concrete example.

Consider this person: and presents a video of a young female who thinks that she is a bird, and uses ey/em/eir pronouns because birds don’t inherently have a gender. (Spoiler alertYes they do!)  And no one has the right to expect me to believe she is a bird.  Yet according to Archon’s logic, “You have to accept it.” 

I am not now, nor have I ever been, a member of the Woke party!
I detest the whole woke movement.  I feel that it is an exaggerated extension of PC (Politically Correct.)  It is the chance for many people, who don’t know what they are talking about, and many of whom don’t have a dog in the fight, to make unsupported claims, and demand that others accept them – sort of like what you’re doing now.  To pretend that you know what I think and believe, and claim that I am a “Woke” Atheist shows that you are either deluded or lying.

What I don’t understand, is the fervent need to finely split Theological hairs on this subject, unless it’s to cover a religious bald spot in your argument.  It has nothing to do with the existence of God.  It’s just a bunch of self-righteous Christian bullies, again insisting on what others must say, do, or think.  The last time that became organized, it was called The Inquisition, and did not end well.

You must have been in a real hurry to jog past the ‘Judge not, lest ye be judged’ spot, which really has nothing to do with you.

As for your bird-brained little Gotcha….
So it’s rather amusing to realize that while woke atheist Archon insists there is “no evidence for god,” he/she believes that girl in the video is a bird (assuming Archon is intellectually sincere and practicing what he/she preaches).

Despite claiming that they read my post, it is apparent that they are still incapable, or unwilling, to understand and accept the differences between ‘Internal’ and ‘External – between ‘Objective’ and ‘Subjective,’ producing another instance of Deluded or Lying.

Lia never made the external claim that she WAS a woman, only that her soul (for those who believe in such foolishness) felt like a woman’s, in a male body.  Little Miss ey/em/eir claims that she IS a bird.  I am quite willing to be intellectually sincere, only if she flies up into a tree, builds a nest, and lays an egg.  That’s what I practice, but I never preach.

***

BTW:  On neither of these websites did I make the claim that there is no evidence for God.”  I have, in the past, said that there is “not sufficiently convincing evidence”, but that’s a grey horse of a different color.  😳

As a matter of fact, on neither of these websites did I state that I am an Atheist.  While not incorrect, that claim is unfounded.  All I did was question the linguistic and logic misusages.  I could have been an outraged Woke Christian.  This is divisive tribalism at its worst.  “If ya ain’t fer us, yer agin us!”   😈

Dim And Dimmer

Two uncommon words walk into a bar, arguing about whether they are homonyms, or homophones.  No-one greets them by name, like Norm, on “Cheers,” because no-one recognises them.

In most cases of homonyms, people know one or both of the odd couple.  Everyone knows both wait, and weight.  Most are familiar with meet and meat, but mete might be a stranger.  I recently ran into a pair of homophones that only word-nerds like me don’t need to be introduced to.  Ladies and gentlemen – let’s have a big hand for the comedy duo of

FAIN AND FEIGN

FAIN: adverb – gladly, willingly – adjective – willing, glad, pleased, eager
FEIGN: imitate deceptively, make believe, pretend, put on an appearance of

Rather than argue about whether to call themselves homonyms, or homophones, they might better try to find another term to describe themselves.  Far too many ‘Good Christians’ in the Bible Belt of the southern United States, particularly in Arkansas and Texas, get far too upset, ‘and don’t cotton to none of that there HOMO-anything!’

A not-out gay comedian was doing a tour of small cities in West Texas.  Perhaps looking for a bit of one-night companionship, he engaged the waitress in a greasy-spoon diner, about the presence of local gay culture – clubs, favored restaurants, etc.  She quickly and firmly informed him, “They ain’t no homosexuals in Texas.  Not live ones, anyways.”

I would fain believe her, and I do not have to feign my distress.

The largest group of homonyms heteronyms includes AIR, ERR, E’ER, ERE, HEIR, AYR, AYRE, AYER and perhaps a Canadian EHer.  I’ll be back in a couple of days.  Be sure to join me, eh.  😉   😆

Malleable Morals

In the middle of a pile of feel-good, but unproven, religious claims, the amateur Christian Apologist suddenly – CLEARLY – wrote….

But we know genocide is evil. Since it IS morally wrong, we know there must be a standard beyond us which is the standard of goodness, righteousness, and justice.  That standard is God. And without God, you can’t say genocide is wrong because that’s just your opinion.

If genocide is evil, and morally wrong, why does the God of the Bible not only condone it, but urge and support it??! I’d ask the Amalekites, but…. you know.   😳

The Amalekites were burning their new born babies over statues as a sacrifice to their gods. They were raping and murdering people. That’s who they were. They were evil and wicked people.

 Is genocide evil and immoral, or not??! You posited a concrete, objective statement that it was, with God as the good, moral, righteous and just basis. Now you seem to be claiming that even though God caused and aided the genocide, the people who were wiped out deserved it.

Maybe they did, but you can’t have it both ways. Now your claims and morals, and the morals of your God, are suspect and subjective. Even your God’s little flood snit-fit to cover the fact that He had made a mistake, and was not in control, was the greatest example of genocide ever recorded…. or made up. The Egyptians and the Chinese don’t seem to have noticed it.   😯

One of my readers wondered why I seem to avoid addressing good Christian arguments, and only pick on the stupid ones.  Partly, it’s because of the entertainment value, but it’s mostly because there are no ‘good’ Christian arguments – only less stupid ones.  It’s all low-hanging fruit.

A young – but none too bright – Apologist has his own YouTube channel, where he posts videos refuting Atheists’ claims, although it often seems as if the whole point is to make Atheists look good.  He supported Ray Comfort’s Holy Banana theory, until an Atheist shot it down in flames.

He recently posted a video in which he, in all apparent seriousness, claimed that, Evolution must be false, because it’s racist.   Darwinism relies on “Survival of the Fittest,” and, if we evolved from African-Americans, how could there still be African-Americans??

If Americans came from Europeans, why are there still Europeans??!  If God created us from dust, why is there still dust??!  So few words – so many mistakes/lies.

Apologists don’t even like to use the word Evolution, lest it gain some validation.  They use the pejorative, Darwinism, dismissing it like crystals, or reiki, or horoscopes.  It does not ‘rely on’ Survival of the Fittest – which does not mean what this racist little fuck seems to think it does.  And, “Evolved from African-Americans”??!  He’s not even smart enough to deny that we evolved from monkeys.  😳

A 15-year-old, male Atheist, tired of listening to his Bible-thumper mother, conned her into calling in to The Atheist Experience podcast.  With absolutely no training in Theology, Philosophy, logic or debate, she faced a moderator who was.

She tried to present a variety of silly, unprovable, kindergarten-level claims, which he quickly and easily refuted.  Her defense then was that he had spoken sternly to her and embarrassed her in front of her son.  The poor dear!  For many of them, that’s what it comes down to.  Some of them need to be spoken to, sternly.  👿

Christian Apologetics Questions Answered – #1

If we can agree that no one can force their religion upon you through separation of Church and State, why should you be able to force your atheism on other people?

How many people have you personally met, who attempt to force Atheism on anyone?
(Comment submitted July 21, 2019)

None, they rarely do it in person in the U.S. (yet). But there are any numbers of Congressmen and judges in the United States who devote their careers to it. And certainly dozens of people who have interacted with me online.

And that’s just in this country. If we look at declared atheist nations–the USSR, China, etc., you get tortured until you become an atheist, and murdered if you don’t. Or often, they skip straight to the murder.
(Responded to April 21, 2021)

Congratulations!  Your lightning-quick word-salad response has won this week’s highly-esteemed GOBBLEDEGOOK Award.  In so few words, you managed to include delusion, unwarranted conclusion, confusion, wordplay, incorrect definitions, improper referral, unproven claims, misdirection, smoke and mirrors, and, I believe, even some strawman arguments.

Being charitable, I will not assume that you presented it as an intentional lie, but rather, as the parroted repetition of claims which you have innocently, if gullibly, accepted.

First, if the USSR and China are declared atheist nations – It was not by them.  The USSR dissolved and has not existed since 1991 – 30 years.  There are still thousands of Russian Orthodox Catholic churches doing well, within the country of Russia today.  The majority of the population is quietly Christian.

The majority of Chinese citizens also claim some religious affiliation, mostly Buddhist or Confucianist.  Those who are harshly dealt with are usually members of aggressive sects who attempt to harass the secular government, and force their beliefs on others…. much like many American Evangelical Christians.

While arrest, punishment and death can influence societal actions and attitudes, no-one can be forced to become an Atheist.  If that were true, then the stories of the Apostles dying as martyrs would be false.

To first make the claim that some countries force citizens to become atheists is already disingenuous.  To then claim that the same is happening in the United States, approaches an outright lie.  What the elected and appointed representatives of the secular Federal Government are doing, is ensuring that the wishes of the Founding Fathers, through the Constitution and Bill of Rights, are carried out.

No-one is being forced to become an Atheist!  But intolerant Religionists are being forced to accept Atheists’ existence and their rights, as established by the law of the land.  Being forced to be an Atheist, and being legally forced to accept the Atheism of others, are two vastly different things.   😯

So, here I am, a Canadian, having to teach Americans about their politics and legal system – an Atheist, having to explain their mistaken religious claims and assumptions, and withstand the shit they spew.  😯  Oh, the burdens I bear.

Perfect One-Liners

A perfectionist walked into a bar….
….Apparently it wasn’t set high enough.

My professor accused me of plagiarism….
….His words, not mine.

During the COVID pandemic….
….Is not the time to surround yourself with positive people.

I’m in an open marriage….
….I just found out.

How do you stop a bull from charging?….
….You just unplug it.

The leading cause of dry skin….
….Is towels.

My wife and I had this long, pointless argument about which vowel is most important….
….I won.

People say that time is money….
….I don’t buy that for a second.

My wife asked if I had seen the dog bowl….
….I said, No, I didn’t know he could.

I got assaulted by a mime for having a spasm….
….He thought I was heckling.

I wish everything was as easy as….
….Getting fat.

I asked my therapist if driving my car 100 MPH was an emotional problem….
….She asked me to pay two weeks in advance.

My wife says she’s going to leave me because of my addiction to poker….
….But I think she’s bluffing.

What do you call someone who can’t stick to a diet?….
….A desserter.

Old age is when you’re faced with two temptations….
….And you choose the one that will get you home by nine o’clock.

The trouble with learning from experience….
….Is that you never graduate.

Wait! One day at a time….
….Like, FOREVER??!

I tried starting up a hot-air balloon company….
….But it never took off.

I’m great at multi-tasking….
….I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate, all at once.

My wife said, “Look at this.  I haven’t worn this in years, and it still fits.”….
….I said, “It’s a scarf.”

If only Sarcasm….
….Burned calories

Killer One-Liners

Jokes about murderers aren’t funny….
….Unless they’re properly executed.

Spiderman was found dead this morning….
….Police suspect he committed insecticide.

I caught my teenage son flying a kite during a thunderstorm….
….I immediately grounded him.

Dr. Frankenstein entered a body-building contest….
….And found that he’d seriously misunderstood the goals.

Atheism and Theism are but two sides of the same coin….
….One prefers to use its head, while the other relies on tales.

Insomnia is terrible, but on the plus side….
….Only three more sleeps till Christmas

If two vegans get into a fight….
….Is it still called a beef?

They say a camera adds ten pounds….
….After my last look in a mirror, I must be under heavy surveillance.

I was eating pizza, before pizza was cool….
….I never seem to learn.

What’s the correct serving size for pizza?….
….Until you hate yourself.

What’s the funniest thing I’ve stolen?….
….A joke.

It’s all fun and games….
….Until your oversize shirts start fitting.

I accidently went shopping on an empty stomach….
….Now I’m the proud owner of aisle seven.

I was waving at my neighbor for ten minutes this morning….
….Before realizing that she was cleaning her windows

Did you hear about the man who lived in a tire?….
….He had a puncture, and now lives in a flat.

A recent study by statisticians shows….
….The average human has one breast and one testicle.

I have a meeting at the bank later to solve all my money worries….
….I’m so excited, I can hardly get the balaclava on.

The cops just left.  They said if I’m gonna walk around the house naked…
….I gotta do it inside.

My doctor diagnosed me as a kleptomaniac….
….I asked, ‘Is there anything I can take for that?’

Do trees shit?….
….Of course they do.  That’s how we get #2 pencils.

My girlfriend told me I need to show more affection….
….Now I have two girlfriends.

If I cut off my right butt cheek….
….I would be left behind.

I had an addiction to masturbation….
….But I beat it.

True Colors

Ladies and gentlemen, this is where a Christian/Atheist religious discussion goes, when it doesn’t go where an evangelical apologist wants it to go.  Sooner or later they show their true colors.

I love when you write about religion and faith because this is my favorite topic. However, it seems like you only want to engage in discussing the worst ideas that Christians present, rather than actually dealing with the difficult questions. Of course it is true that as an atheist you are capable of making moral choices. And I accept that if evolution were true, you would be capable of caring for others through an evolved empathy. However, what if my evolutionary pathway didn’t cause me to have empathy? What if my evolution led me toward conquering others by any means necessary in order to survive? What if I sincerely believed that killing you and stealing your stuff was a moral choice? If you are a cosmic accident, and I am a cosmic accident, then you have no standing on which to claim that anything at all is good or bad. There is no such thing as good or bad. It doesn’t matter if 7 billion cosmic accidents decide that killing is bad. You could put me in jail and stop me from stealing and killing, but you couldn’t actually call my actions bad. There is no one on earth who could say anything is good or bad if we are all cosmic accidents. You put up a meme that says, “Not wanting to know the truth is what makes you stupid.” I completely agree. So, where do you stand on that? If you really want the truth, then why do you tear down stupid arguments and avoid answering real questions? Thanks!

I tear down stupid arguments, because they are stupid arguments. Like assembling car models or collecting coins, it is a retirement hobby that fills some spare time, and gives me a pleasant feeling of accomplishment. What are some real questions that you feel need answering, and why do you think that it is incumbent upon me to answer them??

I accept a wide array of ‘facts’ and opinions which I believe to be the truth, because I have been presented with what I feel is, sufficiently convincing evidence. It is likely that some of my beliefs are false, because of incomplete or incorrect information, but if someone presents me with new evidence, I am open to changing my mind. What ’Truth’ do you think exists, that I am not accepting? I do not discover truth by telling others what I believe, but by asking my own questions, and listening to others.

You are correct that there is no good or bad, and you are also wrong! Good and bad do not exist as concrete, clearly-defined, unchanging, imposed-from-without, terms. They exist because we – individuals and societies – say they do. Good is what increases my well-being. Bad is what decreases my well-being – and my family’s – and my city’s – and my country’s – and Humanity’s. They are amorphous, constantly changing, constantly being negotiated. They require continuous thought and consideration. We need to be responsible for our own actions and attitudes.

I did not mean to say that you have an obligation to answer any argument. I only wondered why you seem to avoid addressing good Christian arguments, and only pick on the stupid ones. You asked which truth I think exists…and I think you know the answer. God exists and there is plenty of evidence for his existence. I have offered to take the time to show you the evidence, but you did not respond to my offer. I’m glad that you at least admit in this comment that good and bad do not exist in a concrete way, since that is consistent with your worldview. But you said that good is what increases your well-being and that of your family, city, etc. You also said that good and bad exist because we say they do. What if my society decides that what is best is to kill millions of Jews, because our race is superior? Does that make it good? And what if I personally decide that what is best for me and my family is to kill you and take your stuff? What if my city decides that what is best for our city is to take over your city and make you our slaves? Is there anyone in the world who could say that would be morally wrong? In your world, no there isn’t. Would you disagree? And on what basis would you disagree?

I pick on stupid Christian arguments, and ignore good ones for a couple of reasons. One is that I don’t seem to ever find good arguments, just ‘less dumb’ ones. Another is that this blog-site is an outlet for my creativity. It is for education, entertainment and amusement. It is not a Theological debate site, and I am not a theologian or trained debater. I am, however, capable of holding foolish claims and statements up to ridicule. I do it with social, political, legal, logic, and linguistics. If you don’t want to see your ox gored, don’t watch. It’s like news services; they don’t run ’Dog bites man’ stories. They run MAN BITES DOG. So do I.

I have not accepted your kind offer for various reasons also. First, better men than you have tried and failed. Second, you don’t seem to be offering anything new, only a protracted brainwashing program that will eat my time, and benefit only you. It will not lead me to the truth, only an attempt to convince me that what is offered is true. Lastly, if the Christian God exists, the Bible says that He hardens the hearts of many people, making them unable to see the truth. All your hopes and prayers are ineffective against His plan.

Your questions indicate that you still view Good and Bad as concrete entities. What is good for you (and yours) is bad for me. We each need to consider what will produce The Greatest Good For The Greatest Number. The victors get to write the history. That’s what the Holy Inquisition was all about. If only Nazi Germans had survived, strong and prosperous, then killing Jews would have been good – for them – but each city and nation must live with, and get along with, the rest of mankind. I don’t steal, because I do not want anyone to steal from me – or kill, or rape, or enslave, or invade, or destroy – Do Unto Others. What would the world be like if everyone did that??

At the end, you slide into ‘morally wrong.’ I would disagree, because this is an entirely different concept from ‘Good and Bad.’ If God does not exist, then “Morals” do not exist, only the evolutionary empathetic urge to assist and improve the lot of individuals, and Humanity in general, so that our lot will also be improved. Be good, for goodness’ sake.

You said that “we each need to consider what will produce the greatest good for the greatest number.” But if I follow your worldview to its logical conclusion, then it doesn’t matter whether I shoot up a school full of children or bake them all cookies. Those are moral equivalents, because we live a meaningless existence. You atheists want to play pretend that things actually matter, while holding a worldview where things don’t matter. And then you cry when someone shoot (sic) schoolkids (sic). Why be upset just because a cosmic accident decided not to play your game of pretend? Your worldview is completely inconsistent with your actions. I suspect that you know God is there, you just don’t want him to tell you to stop looking at porn. Enjoy it while you can, Archon! Thanks for your response. I won’t bother you anymore since you are not interested in spending your time this way.   (My emphasis)

Five minutes after I got the above comment, I got a frantic email – not apologizing, (s)he still stood by all the claims, but was worried about how it would make this ‘loving Christian’ appear to the public.

I will totally understand if you delete it

No, no! Just the opposite. Not that anyone will come back to this post and read it, but I am leaving it up as a cautionary tale, and an object lesson.  Congratulations!  You get to be the star of one of Archon’s ‘Christians vs. Atheists’ posts.  Your date with infamy will be Feb. 24/21 if morbid curiosity drives you to investigate.

Two weeks later: I guess it is just going to be another post where you congratulate yourself for being such a good and intelligent person.

More interested in winning than engaging in a discussion, when it became obvious that they were not going to be taken seriously and agreed with, it quickly devolved into insults, personal attacks, strawman arguments, claims to be able to read my mind and insist on what I ‘knew’, calling me a liar, and accusations of my immoral behavior.  For those who have waded through this saga, what are your thoughts??  😕